suddenly sahm

An Open Letter to You

2011-01-04T10:07:00.000-08:00

It’s been a fun ride, but this is my last post…for a while, at least.

I started this blog at the beginning of my journey as a stay at home mom, nearly two years ago. At the time, I didn’t know where it would take me. I had the kernel of an idea that the transition from seven years as a full time working mother of two, to a laid off, at-home mom, would yield lots of interesting situations and unique experiences. I thought that a blog would be the perfect forum for documenting and sharing that experience.

In 2008 and 2009, when the economy was falling apart and people were losing their jobs left and right, I never saw stories in the media that mirrored my own. Where were the other women like me? I wanted this blog to be a place for that missing voice to be heard.

This was the space where I openly struggled with the work vs. no work question, where I celebrated some of life’s small, but precious moments, and where I learned the ins and outs of blogging, tweeting, and photo sharing.

Since returning to work four months ago, I simply do not have the physical, emotional, or psychological energy to maintain the blog as I would like to. I think about it…a lot. I write posts in my head about recipes and cookbooks and outings with the kids and meditations on life, but the posts do not get written.

I feel this period in my life has reached a natural end and it’s time to leave this space. I don’t know yet if it will be permanent. I am also toying with some other new ideas that I might explore as an alternative.

I will monitor the inbox for suddenlysahm@gmail.com, so if you ever want to drop me a line, that’s where you can reach me.

Wishing you a peaceful and refreshing start to the New Year!

Jen

Project 365, put to bed

2011-01-02T09:06:00.000-08:00

In the spirit of not being too hard on myself, I'm not going to qualify this post by saying that I didn't really stick to the rules of project 365 (snicker, snicker, I just did). Rather, my project 365 was one done in spirit...The photos were not always taken on the day they were named for. Ah, well. This project became much harder when I returned to full time work eight months in. When you are in an office all day, it's hard to take inspiring photos day after day. The last four months were really saved by my travels and the fact that during the holiday season, there are just a lot more photo ops.

I picked one from each month of the year to share here. Enjoy:

January - New Year's Day snowshoeing

February - 24 hours alone together in Bellingham

March - letterboxing in Oregon

April - benedetto di uova

May - tulip

June - getting on a plane

July - Paradise, Mt. Rainier

August, canning spectacular

September - emerging sunflower

October - Mt. Rainier from a plane

November - approaching storm, Cancun, Mexico

December - holidays at home

A Dream Deferred

2010-12-29T09:56:00.000-08:00

Several months ago, I alluded to an "exciting new project" here. Well, that exciting new project never quite came to fruition.

I had planned to open a small business called "handmade jeny" to sell stuff I make for fun through etsy...salted bacon caramels, greeting cards with my photography, perhaps a handbag and quilt or two...but it never happened.

I went so far as to have a logo designed. I knew deep down at the time that this effort probably would not get off the ground at any time in the near future. Still, designing the logo with Kris was an "exciting new project" all on its own.

It turns out that I can't have it all all at once. Since going back to work I hardly run anymore, I have a hard time meeting my self-imposed project 365 commitment, there's no time for quilting, etc., etc., etc. My life has taken a sharp turn and the cards have all been re-shuffled.

So, handmade jeny will have to wait until another time in my life, or maybe she will stay a beautiful dream to contemplate.

To Give and Receive

2010-12-26T11:57:00.000-08:00

In a season filled with gifts, one given and one received stand out for me this year....

Given:
I snapped this photo of my mom and my sister at my brother's wedding last summer. I thought it was a terrific shot of them, so I framed the black and white, included a color version behind it and gave one to each of them. :)

Received:
I admit it. I cried. My little men made this for me...I will cherish it for many, many years and yes, it is going to the office with me tomorrow.

Oh, and we finally got the boys a Wii...God help us!

SAHM for five days

2010-12-22T07:21:00.000-08:00

The working Suddenly Sahm is starting the first of five days at home baking, wrapping, writing christmas cards, santa visit, the whole shebang!

Here's my favorite shot from last week - tubing at Snoqualmie pass on the hubby's birthday:

As I like to say at work these days, (because I am a process nerd), Feliz Navidata!

Old-Fashioned, Soft Pumpkin Cookies

2010-12-14T00:26:00.000-08:00

Stephanie asked me for this recipe. I make these cookies every year. For the icing, I like to either mix a little buttermilk or freshly squeezed orange juice with powdered sugar. I also make 'em pretty big (because I am too lazy to make a lot of cookies ;)

Santa would love these - enjoy!

Unique, Fun, Handmade Christmas (or anytime!) Gift

2010-12-11T14:17:00.000-08:00

I'd like to direct your attention to a fun little business run by Suddenly Sahm's mom:

Carol's Music Boxes:

Her handmade music boxes come in two sizes and you can probably choose from existing inventory or give her the specs for a custom designed one. I'm giving these to the boys' teachers this year for a holiday gift. The one with the poinsettia plays "Deck the Halls" and the one with the Santa plays "Up On The Rooftop".

Reasonably priced, unique, handmade, and fun. Oh, and endorsed by Suddenly Sahm.

Where Am I?

2010-12-09T22:16:00.000-08:00

I don't know, but I'm certainly not here.

I am somewhere between overtired, recovering from being sick, overworking, the exhausting travel and not preparing for the holidays.

We had a lovely Thanksgiving here and my body decided to shut down immediately upon placing the meal on the table. I guess the idea of three days with no obligations was too much for it to compute.

I don't come here much these days as blogging requires a bit of brain space that I can no longer seem to spare. I think of posting ideas, but I am too tired slash don't have the emotional slash psychological energy to write the post. My current internet goal is to hang on and complete project 365. I am too close to quit, but frankly, I am looking forward to being freed from an obligation.

Wow, this post is a downer. This job has been more demanding than I originally signed up for and I am fervently hoping that things quiet down to a dull roar after the first of the year. This week I leave for work in the dark, come home in the dark and spend the intervening hours in a windowless conference room with two co-workers, walls papered with notes, charts and process maps. Let's just say I'm ready for the weekend. It's been one of those weeks where I keep thinking it's a day later than it really is. Yes, today is Thursday, but I found myself repeatedly fantasizing that it was actually Friday.

I am not offering any fun stories or recipes or craft/activity/decorating suggestions or musings on the working mom life...this year, my holidays are all about psychological survival.

One thing that I made time to do was load a ton of Christmas music on my ipod...all my albums and some selected songs. The only other song I really want isn't available on itunes and I don't know why. I encourage you to check out the Sounds of the Season channel on ondemand (if you have comcast) and hope to hear Peter Cincotti's version of My Favorite Time of Year...holiday jazz classic hearkening back to Andy Williams. good times. enjoy.

Wishing you peace as we count down the days to the New Year.

November Shots

2010-11-30T21:11:00.000-08:00

Sunny Madrid

Chilly Munich

Rainy London

Stormy Cancun

Warm home

With my family

And Another Thing

2010-11-24T07:10:00.000-08:00

After re-reading last night's post, I feel compelled to add that I am EXTREMELY GRATEFUL that I have a job (even if I don't want it)...that I have a loving husband and healthy children...that I have a warm, safe, comfortable home...that I am able to provide Thanksgiving dinner..and that my family will be together for the holiday.

Thanksgiving and the Working Hostess

2010-11-23T20:38:00.000-08:00

Last year at this time, I was waxing poetic about sharpening knives and cleaning ovens. This year, well it's different.

This is my rambling getreadyforthanksgiving post. As I read back over the links above to last year's posts I am thinking, "who is this crazy person?"

Having just returned from traveling five of the last six weeks, I am trying to reconnect with my life, my family and my home. Add to that the mountain of work I am currently buried under (the result of all those site visits) and the fact that the Puget Sound area has basically shut down under the weight of snow and frigid temperatures and you get a pretty harried Thanksgiving hostess.

As I write this, I am taking a brief break from work. The benefit of working from home is that Addy the cat is my faithful assistant, I can work in my sewing room, surrounded by things I love and with a view of the neighbor's snowy backyard and I don't have to get out of my pajamas.

I am T minus 44 hours until the big dinner and I am already behind. I strategized my grocery shopping in hopes of completing it in only one trip. I was fortunate enough to be able to pay someone else to clean my house (a luxury I only indulge in twice a year, Thanksgiving and a Spring cleaning in May).

...But I still haven't cleaned the ovens or sharpened the knives or set the table. I haven't made my cranberry sauce or roasted the garlic for the mashed potatoes or cut up the bread for the dressing.

We just got the word that school is closed again tomorrow due to icy conditions. Sigh. I will be in the house all day with the boys, behind on dinner preparations, feeling the weight of the work I need to complete bearing down on me and all I feel in anticipation of tomorrow is tired. and it hasn't even happened yet.

I could stay up late into the night and workwork or go do some holiday prep and get up v. early to get some more workwork done. I havn't figured out how I'm going to get from here to dinner Thursday, but it will come whether I am ready or not. At least this year I loosened up a bit about letting others contribute to the meal. I gave up rolls, appetizers and dessert...and I've decided at the age of forty that no one is interested in salad with Thanksgiving dinner. So there you have it.

A friend mentioned to me the other day on the topic of working motherhood that she wasn't sure how she was going to be able to "properly enjoy the holidays" (while a working mother). This comment stuck with me on a number of levels...I find myself wondering if last year was the only time in the last several years that I have "properly enjoyed..."..what does it mean to "properly..."...should you expect to be able to "properly..." every year? I don't have any good answers, but it sure got me thinking. I hope this year, starting with Thanksgiving, that one of the ways I am "properly enjoying" the day is by letting go and letting it be what it will be; by trying to fnd the joy in the things that don't go as planned as well as the ones that do.

Jet Lag

2010-11-15T04:48:00.000-08:00

What do you do when you can't sleep at 3 am? Why, you play around a bit with your blog, of course and try to decide how early you can go to work. I'm not sweating the jet lag much as I leave again in a little over 24 hours for Cancun...that should shave a couple of hours off my problem.

The last few weeks were a whirlwind. I'm pretty exhausted and really don't feel like leaving again. I'm only home for two days, so it's hard to get back into the swing of my home life when I know I just have to leave.

Getting off the plane from London, I gave myself a little pep talk about how I wasn't going to totally embarass myself when I saw my family in the airport (but of course I did). I blew through people, running to them and nearly knocked them over such was the force of my hug.

I added a new feature to the blog on the right side tonight (this morning?) the links to the monthly photo summaries from the year. The end of project 365 is in sight and though I didn't execute it perfectly, it's still a meaningful look back for me.

The new banner photo is one I took in the Madrid airport around 5am. I'm really looking forward to waking up Saturday morning in my own bed and knowing that I don't have to leave again any time soon.

Here is a photo of me taken on The Eye in London on Friday afternoon.

It was raining, but that couldn't dampen my enthusiasm!

I really love London and it was wonderful having a bit of time to explore on my own. My colleagues left for Rome late Friday afternoon, so I spent the evening at the National Gallery and roaming around. The next morning I walked all the way to Harrod's in Knightsbridge and back to my hotel at Charing Cross before flying out. I must look at home in London because people kept asking me for directions!

This is a photo of our hotel. It is directly across the water from The Eye and I can't say enough about how wonderful it was. My favorite of all the places we've stayed (thus far).

It's called The Royal Horseguards and you can read about its' history here.

Fourteen Days

2010-11-09T14:10:00.000-08:00

Fourteen Days...is a long freaking time to be away from your home, your husband, your children.

Okay, my home, my husband...my children.

My children. I have never been away from Big Red for more than four days. I've never been away from Tank for more than seven days. I am on day ten. Four more to go. I am in heavy withdrawl as I write this. It's late at night in this fancy Munich hotel room, but only afternoon at home. What are they doing right now?

Before I left for my European tour, my sister gave me an excellent idea - to leave them a surprise for each day that I was gone. Whew - fourteen days and two boys. I had to pull this together in the last couple of days before I left and ended up finishing this project only hours before my flight.

I used brown paper lunch sacks with something inside, stapled closed. The outside had the day number, the day of the week, the date and their first initial. Some of the days had one bag for both of them or to include their dad. Some days had specific instructions to open in the morning or evening or one of the bags before the other.

I enjoyed putting them together. We also started skyping on this trip. It is EXPONENTIALLY better than a telephone conversation. You get to see each other in real time. Most days they have opened their bags while we are skyping. I didn't make myself a cheat sheet and I was really tired when I finished up, so it is also a surprise to me to see what is in their bags.

The danger of skyping with your kids when you are away from them is this: you cry. I couldn't help it; I was completely weepy on the third day. I just wanted to hold them and ruffle their hair and smell their heads. I know it was hard on them and I feel terrible. It was one of those things that I didn't see coming. It just hit me and I couldn't help it. I've kept it together ever since.

Another VERY cool thing about the skype is that you can take a snapshot of your kids at any time during the conversation...if yours turns out anywhere near as good as mine, it can become your desktop background...(completely unposed, btw. They don't even know you did it!)

Here's some of the things I put in their bags. I didn't want it to be too commercial, but I also didn't have a lot of time to weave scavenger hunt haikus out of sustainably raised hemp.

unopened carefully selected netflix movie with microwave popcorn for a Saturday afternoon
I mixed up dry ingredients and provided instructions for them to make pancakes on Sunday morning
new paints and brushes for them to make me pictures for when I come home
a card that came from grandma and grandpa in the mail
on Halloween (day one) light up necklaces for trick or treating
$5 Fatburger gift cards
silly bands
lip balm
packs of gum
a book for the little one and instructions to the older one to read it to him
a Lego game that they could build and play together (and give dad a break!)

I know there's more but it seems like a long time ago and I don't remember what else I gave them. I'm looking forward to tomorrow's call to find out!

More than that, I'm looking forward to two whole days at home with them before I have to leave again for the last trip of the year to Cancun for four days...I am road weary.

October

2010-11-07T14:25:00.000-08:00

The best of October...selected from a hotel room in Munich around midnight on November 7th...

Fall scene at a farm in Skagit County

we are men. we hunt punkins.

Dallas is a strange place.

view from high up in Vdara (Las Vegas)

Rainier, taken from a plane

The trick or treat I missed - may it be the first and last.

More on Madrid, Segovia, Avila, and Munich later...

The Halloween That Wasn't

2010-11-02T15:14:00.000-07:00

Because mommy is on a business trip.

I missed Halloween. I am mostly over it, but still harbor a little guilt and sadness over missing the Trick or Treating. I helped the boys get their costumes and we did a dress rehearsal Saturday, so I could see them together and take a couple of pictures.

I left cider and cake donuts with their dad for post trick or treating (a family tradition).

Harry Potter and Leonardo, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle (with a light sabre)

The car picked me up for the airport before 5:00 am Sunday morning and I was up for a collective 32 hours before falling in to bed the following night in Madrid.

Let's just say this was a far cry from last Halloween.

One thing about being away is that it reminds you how much you matter in the lives of your loved ones.

Buenos Noches.

Will she ever post again?

2010-10-26T22:06:00.000-07:00

"Keeping Up with My Life" is exhausting. Leaving on Sunday morning for FOURTEEN DAYS in Europe - Madrid, Munich, London...14 days away from my boys. Then three days home and five more days in Mexico. Then Thanksgiving. We set up the Skype...I am planning surprises for them while I am gone...to do list to catch up on life as long as my arm...seems I always remember the adds when driving or showering...pensive, tired, anxious, excited, sad, wistful...want to make some fluffy pumpkin cookies and an apple pie...no time.

Here's the front and back of a recently finished quilt...knitting is calming these days...only two items left in the quilty UFO stash. Fantasizing about items to sew for my boys for Christmas.

This hamster keeps a runnin' on the wheel.

Front:

Back:

On The Road

2010-10-18T22:29:00.000-07:00

It's unreal to me that I haven't blogged for almost two weeks! Tonight, I'm writing from my room on the 47th floor, high atop the new hotel Vdara in Las Vegas. It's week two of the work travel. Last week was Dallas, but more on that later.

I've loaded a bunch of photos and am working on organizing them for project 365. I have many days to catch up on. I'm going to do at least five a day. I'm now up to October 9th - which feels like a tremendous accomplishment. These new concessions to work life make me wistful. There simply aren't the hours in the day anymore to have as much art and color and beauty and peace as I used to have.

This is my first time in Vegas and I have to say I don't love it. It seems sad to me in a way that's hard to articulate...kind of like an old woman trying to stay thin and beautiful with a personal trainer and plastic surgery. I can't imagine staying here for more than a week at the absolute outside. My stint is four days.

This is probably the fanciest hotel room I've ever stayed in. Personal space is important to me and this is truly a sanctuary. There is a giant deep soaking tub, I have a panoramic view, dining space, living space, three phones and two huge flat screens. It's still strange to be alone though. I realized on the trip last week that I'm not really used to being alone in this way anymore...it reminds me of when I was single, living alone in a studio apartment. Actually, this suite is larger than many apartments I've called home. funny.

I haven't made any apple butter yet this year, which bums me out, but I'm hoping that I can get to it this weekend. I'l be home for just a week then it's three more weeks on the road and then it's pretty much Thanksgiving. Time. Flies.

I have many reflections on the business travel mommy situation. I'll try to articulate them into a post soon. After all, I'm just lying here on my kajillion thread count sheets with nothing better to do. :)

g'night all....

Nearly Meatless Mad Men Monday

2010-10-05T21:27:00.000-07:00

saute 1/4 lb chopped pancetta in a bit of olive oil with a bunch of chopped swiss chard (from my garden!) and a half dozen cremini mushrooms, sliced. If you are an over-achiever, add a sliced shallot or other aromatic such as garlic, leek, or some variety of onion. Cook half a small box of orzo. drain. toss into veg/pancetta mixture and saute. If you have pine nuts, now is the time. Taste for seasoning. Add some fresh ground pepper. Add some kosher or sea salt. Finish with a small knob of fresh farmhouse butter (that we got at Golden Glen - yay!). Plate. Grate some romano or parm over the top. If you are me, serve with a scoop of steamed carrots (from my garden - yay!). We paired it with a light pinot but it wasn't quite right. Back to the drawing board.

The Mad Men part of nearly meatless Monday is that I prefer to watch Mad Men on On Demand on Monday nights so I can buzz through the commercials. I think Roger is about to self-destruct. Anyone else?

September - What I want to remember

2010-10-05T00:40:00.000-07:00

And sometimes, It's more than a week

2010-10-04T04:16:00.000-07:00

What happened to my life? I've gone away. poof.

It's so strange to leave my life every morning and come back in to it at night. I've been gone all this time and nothing has changed. My days used to be a whirlwind of activity around the house and I miss it. I wish I had the time and energy to bake something.

I'm also pretty creaky from the sedentary work life. I'm running again, but just the general lack of inactivity over the day wears on me.

I have some travel coming up, some of it international which provides me with lots of conflicting emotions all at the same time. Exciting, nervous and it makes me tired to think about it. At this time, I'm scheduled to be gone three out of the next five weeks. yikes.

And here I am at 4 am...I'm usually not an insomniac, but I'm worried about a situation and trying to figure out how to handle it.

One more thing - book recommendation - Room by Emma Donoghue is supposed to be the hot book right now, but after reading the jacket, I decided that it would be too rough for me...but you might like it.

I just finished Red Hook Road and I am a big Ayalet Waldeman fan. I like everything she does. I started reading her when she was writing the Mommy Track Mysteries. These books have titles like "The Big Nap" and "A Playdate with Death".

I miss this and had to scrawl out a few thoughts since I'm up anyway...xo-Jen

Two Minutes, Just Two Minutes

2010-09-23T21:23:00.000-07:00

A long time ago, when I worked for Amazon, they ran what is still for me the best ad campaign they've ever done. There was a choir of middle aged men singing, "two minutes, just two minutes, I spent two minutes shopping for your gift..." among other awesomely corny tunes.

There's a theme there. Yes, you can buy someone the perfect gift online in two minutes. There are a lot of other things you can accomplish in two minutes. Or fifteen...or twenty. My point is that you don't need long periods of time to accomplish a lot.

I think I forgot this when I was home. When time ceased to be a luxury. In my previous working life, I could be a producer of epic proportions in the cooking and quilting departments. Friends would ask me how and I'd just shrug and say "twenty minutes a day...just make a little bit of progress every day".

In The Happiness Project, the author espouses the "evening tidy up". If you spend fifteen minutes at the end of the night doing this and that, tomorrow will be much easier to handle. She's right. Although sometimes, it's pretty hard to get motivated to do that fifteen minutes.

As you know, I have been struggling to take my daily project 365 photo since returning to work. I discovered that I had missed about four days out of the last nine and at first I was really depressed about it. Then I just picked up my camera and went outside (a life rule).

In and around my house, in about ten minutes, I took some really beautiful photographs and more than enough to fill the gap of the missing days. From here until the end of the year, I cannot promise that a photo assigned to a day was actually taken on that day. I will do my best, but I still plan to assign a photo to each day. I just might take the majority of them on the weekend ;).

I uploaded, edited and organized the photos. The next morning I woke up and two people (one a stranger) had tagged one of the ten minute garden photos as a favorite on Flickr. Which is what inspired this post. I didn't spend an afternoon looking for the right shots. I spent ten minutes. And quite by accident, I took one of my best photos ever.

My mom always tells me that with the parenting it isn't the quantity of time, it's the quality. I don't have a quantity now, so I have to believe it's the quality. Still, I miss taking them to school and picking them up...snuggling in the morning and chatting while chilling after school. It's just not the same, but I think I'm starting to accept that.

Enough rambling...and now...here's that photo. I hope you like it too. I call it "emerging". It's a sunflower in my garden that is less than a day from bursting open...maybe I'm getting close to opening too.

Catch Up Catch Up Catch UpCatchUpCatchUp

2010-09-21T20:15:00.000-07:00

That's what I'm back to...playing catch up. all the time. At times, it's invigorating being so busy. Most of the time I feel like I'm just trying to keep my head above water. The sitting all day, lack of movement business is hard. I feel creaky a lot. I'm going to have to design an at-my-desk stretching program.

Evidently this blogging thing is going to be a weekly event...sigh. Favorite photo of the past week:

Something's Gotta Give

2010-09-14T21:15:00.000-07:00

The road...I can see a little bit, but I don't know what's around the bend.

As part of returning to the world of the working, it has once again dawned on me that if you can't have a clean house, healthy marriage, happy children, toned thighs and a wonderful career all at the same time, what can you have?

I managed to more or less cobble together a non-working life that fit me. It took a long time, some trial and error, and perseverance. Now that I have added what is essentially at least 50 hours of work time a week (including commute) into that mix, some things have to go.

I am in week two of return to work life and each day gets a tiny bit easier. Still, I am sitting in messy house. I didn't take a picture today. I watch my husband wash dishes and he is packing the lunches and getting the kids off to school and I don't really like it. It's all weird.

The hard stuff...I forgot that when you pick up your child from care, be it daycare, preschool (full day) or afterschool care, they have that smell. They have a weird, unfamiliar smell much like the office film you get after a day of work. Picking the boys up is easily the very, very best part of my day. At the same time, it is a little heartbreaking to hug them and smell on the tops of their heads that smell that says that they weren't with me today. I think this is something moms get, but if my wonderful husband read this he would be scratching his head. Big Red also usually has a little smudge of something on his shirt or his face that I would have wiped off, but nobody else has noticed. I have to leave the house before they get up. If I see them, it's too hard. Friday morning, Big Red called me at the office before he left for school. His small voice on the phone was almost more than I could bear. Today, he stumbled downstairs in his footy pajamas with his big red rooster hair just as I was leaving because he wanted to see me. Saying goodnight to them and knowing that I won't see them again until 5 pm the next day. I don't talk about them at work, and I haven't put up any pictures of them. For now at least, I have to disengage and compartmentalize as much as possible. Small things are little heartbreaks for me.

By the time the boys are in bed, I am totally exhausted. Maybe this will ease up as I get used to this life again. I don't have any energy to quilt or knit or blog or cook. I barely have enough energy to go through my personal email, which piles up all day. (If I owe you a response to something, I apologize.) I managed two short runs over the weekend, but that's it.

I know I sound like a big melodramatic whiner, but there it is. I think we both know that I could go on, but I'm going to cut it off here. So, I am adjusting. It's sort of fun to use my brain, which was getting dusty. That's the good stuff, I guess.

Are you curious about any aspects of the sahm to watom (work at the office mom) transition? If so, let me know and I'll try to speak to it.

One thing I do find I have time for is the occasional Twitter post. I think I am starting to think in 140 characters or less. My Twitter feed is on the right side of this page. I'll also try to keep the photos updated, even if I'm not writing posts. Maybe I'll go to a weekly format?

To those of you who are still reading this blog, thanks for staying with me and thanks for all your words of support.

Thought for Today

2010-09-09T15:01:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of LOD:

"If you think blogs in general are just a load of useless, narcissistic oversharing, you really won’t have any use for this one."

Hear, hear.

It's not so bad

2010-09-08T20:23:00.000-07:00

Ac-cen-tu-ate the positive...e-lim-in-ate the negative and don't mess with mister in-between...

Pros:

badge picture isn't the worst one I've ever taken (even though mouth looks a bit Bells-Palsy funky)
nice laptop
great pay
desk near window
relatively private cube
quiet office
nice people
interesting work, lots of professional opportunity
fancy Starbucks brewed by the cup to order
all manner of free drinks, food, parties, mandatory fun
completely reimbursed parking
casual dress
work from home options
international travel
very flexible hours
laid back staff
working for a company with (gasp!) money!
desk to home in as little as 25 minutes.

And I only cried twice today. If I keep reducing the crying by half with each passing day, I'll be done by the end of the week...I could probably graph that and put it into a colorful powerpoint slide.

On the whole I'd say I'm a big whiner and though I would rather be home, I probably have a better job than 95% of Americans...

First Day

2010-09-07T19:34:00.000-07:00

I only cried four times.

August Photos

2010-09-04T09:58:00.000-07:00

As I look back through my photographs from August, they aren't very striking. I don't know what I was doing, but I was not focusing (haha) on taking great pictures. Nevertheless, here they are:

special dinner with old friends

2010 canning labels

blueberry picking at Mercer Slough

quilt club lovelies

a day at the fair

22 hours alone together

Marissa's house.

Peace Arch

back to school

Back to Work

2010-09-03T15:47:00.000-07:00

I've been trying to write this post for several days, in my head mostly, but didn't know how.

I'm going back to work. I start next week. I have mixed feelings about it, intensely personal ones. This is just an announcement, I suppose.

One of the things I'd like your guidance on is what to do with this blog. Will it make me a fraud to continue to write as Suddenly Sahm, or can I pull it off like Laid Off Dad who has returned to work and still blogs. I don't know.

It's a hard time of transition and anxiety and apprehension. One day at a time, and all that. I'm trying to fall back on some of my life rules right now...everything ends and that's okay...always choose the bigger life...keep looking forward...play the hand I'm dealt...help is everywhere...and taking lots of deep breaths.

So there it is...and just in time for labor day...happy holiday weekend.

Garden in Process

2010-09-02T21:49:00.000-07:00

Cleaning out my behind the curtain blog stuff tonight and ran across this half-written post from mid-April which four months later I now find hysterical and I hope it gives you a chuckle. Many things did not survive our damp cold Spring, but here is a photo of how our little kitchen garden looked a few weeks ago...those are the tomatoes on the left, boy did they ever take off. I have some work to do along that fence and some fall planting to do. I'm thinking about a bench for sitting somewhere here, maybe a little potting bench, maybe a water feature of some sort. Next year, we are replacing the sunflowers with raspberries and it will all truly be an edible garden.

**beginning of draft post**

I am not a gardener.

I am not being self-deprecating. Dirt and plants scare me. Sort of. How does a little seed know that it is supposed to be an eggplant and not a gerbera daisy??? Sometimes I think I like the idea of gardening more than the actual gardening.

We are currently working on finishing the garden space that we started last summer. We've taken basically the South side of our house and hubby built three 4 x 8 raised beds in the center. There are plum trees and blueberry bushes and we are working on the rest. There will be giant sunflowers and lots of wildflowers, climbing hydrangea on the fence, and we are looking for a fig tree. Today, we planted the raised beds. One of them was already about half full of strawberries from last year's planting. It's only year two for two of the beds and year one for the third bed. We are still amending the soil.

The boys were occupied in a rock moving operation and my husband was digging out beds and figuring out where the borders of our paths would be and I sort of found myself alone with the three beds and a dozen packets of seeds. uh....okay. Some of them were to be 1/4" deep and an inch apart, some 1" deep and 6" apart and so on and so forth...I sort of figured out which plants in which beds (different looking leaves turned out to be the decider here so I wouldn't get confused.) I started to divide the beds into rows at which point my husband took the rake out of my hand and sort of built raised rows. He then saw how I was planting in the rows and suggested I make "furrows" in the rows. Furrows? What the hell is a furrow? You mean like my brow at this moment?

I am not known as a patient woman. It is not my gift. It is hard for me to believe that I have to wait seven to ten days to see what pops up out of the ground. Right now, it's just brown beds of dirt. I drew a map of where everything was planted so we would know what was coming up where. I'm looking forward to seeing how our harvest turns out. I'm still not a gardener. Planted today:

pumpkins
carrots
radishes
arugula
swiss chard
mixed lettuces
cucumbers
bell peppers
snap peas

We still have to plant eggplant, melons, tomatoes, zucchini, fennel and some misc items that I am going to start in "Jiffy" pots in the kitchen window (and maybe leave there!) Haha - wish me luck!

Big Red's Big Day

2010-09-01T22:25:00.000-07:00

After putting you through two days of these, I should tell you that this is a long standing tradition in my family. Every year on the front porch with shiny shoes on the first day of school.

I should also tell you that I cried like a baby for about 30 minutes after we dropped him off this morning.

my baby. I didn't want to let go.

First Day of School

2010-08-31T10:15:00.000-07:00

Where does the time go...3rd grade...halfway through elementary...he was up and dressed at dawn. He was excited and I was a little teary. Here we go!

Why I love living here

2010-08-26T19:25:00.000-07:00

Because on certain summer nights at dusk, I can see things like this on my street...

Yes, I took it from the car with my crappy Blackberry camera, but as Darcy says, "the best camera is the one you have with you."

Amen, sista.

Pickled Fruit

2010-08-26T10:28:00.000-07:00

I had never before heard of pickled fruit. Never before last summer, that is. Burning Pasta introduced me to the idea of pickled peaches. Then this summer, Food In Jars introduced me to the idea of pickled cherries.

I've made both. They are delicious. Though cherry season is gone, there's still time for you to make a small batch of pickled peaches, even if you don't "can" them. You can still make them and keep them in a container in the fridge for a few weeks.

I have to tell you that pickling seems to be the easiest canning imaginable. Much less labor intensive than making jam, for instance (in my opinion). You basically clean and prep the fruit and jars, boil a pickling solution and pour it over the fruit. seal.can.repeat. easy-peasy.

For the fruit, you don't seem to have to wait like you would for say green beans or kirby cukes which are a several weeks' wait proposition after they are submerged. I only let the peaches and cherries sit a few days to bathe in their brine before they are ready. They will still of course, keep several months.

What other fruit do you think should be pickled? The peaches and cherries were not my recipes, but if I thought of a compelling fruit to pickle, I'd happily come up with my own.

She's Leaving

2010-08-24T14:37:00.000-07:00

And I'm bummed.

It feels like everything is about to change...my friend's move...the seasons change...school starts next week...and other things. I am bracing myself against all the change and trying to remember to take it one day at a time. I don't consider myself a person who has difficulty with change, but this time feels a little different.

She'll probably hate this picture..her eyes are closed, but there it is. My friend. in the park. on a sunny day. I'm an introvert. I don't make friends easily. I don't have what I would call a lot of friends, particularly in my adopted suburban community. She is special. She was my neighbor. She showed me how she does the stay at home mom thing. She showed me how she navigated the social scene at the school. She introduced me to Letterboxing. We share a love of photography, cooking, reading, knitting...she helped me feel like I'm enough just being me. She has about the most generous heart of anyone I know and today I have to say goodbye to her. and it hurts more than I thought it would.

Canning Labels and Mishaps

2010-08-20T11:32:00.000-07:00

Ok, I'm a Bad Blogger. Fallen down on the job. I promised a canning post every day this week and I did not deliver. sue me.

I did want to chime in about a couple of other things...canning labels and canning mishaps.

Here is a shot of the labels I designed for this year. I have so far canned seven things, which puts me ahead of pace for this time last year, but there is still much to be done. The blackberries will be ready soon, then we have tomatoes, apples, and cranberries. I'll be canning well into Fall.

Okay, here's a closeup:

I really love doing the labels. Looking online for cool free fonts and picking the colors, etc. If that's not of interest to you, there are some sites that offer free printables. Here's one.

The other item I wanted to mention today is that you will have occasional mishaps.

Upright Jars
If you buy the very large boiling water canner like I did, it comes with a rack that is best suited for quart jars.

I have yet to can anything in a quart jar. If you plan to can in pints and half pints, I recommend investing in a flat canner rack. The rack that comes with the pot is configured in such a way that it is hard to keep small jars upright. The other thing you can do is pack empty jars around the filled ones to help keep them upright. If your jars tip over, they are likely to get jar contents between the jar and the seal and that will cause you sealing problems and leakage. Also, eventually the rack that came with your pot will wear out and require replacement. Make sure if you are buying a replacement rack that it will fit snugly in your canner.

White Film On Jars
Until I started canning, I didn't know that I had hard water. My jars came out of their water bath with an unsightly white, chalky film. This is easily remedied by pouring a little white vinegar into the canning bath with each batch. Over time, it builds up on the rack as well.

Bottle Breakage
While canning pickled peaches the other day, I broke a jar. At the end of the canning period, I was lifting out the jars from the water bath and the bottom of one of the jars came off in a single piece. I believe this to be extremely rare. If I had been making jam it would have been an unholy mess, but as it was, it was just brine and large peach pieces. Clean the jars, clean the canner, and move on. I did not take a photo of the broken jar. sorry.

Scorched jam

Last week, I was making a batch of apricot jam and had to walk away from the stove for a minute. I had left my apricot jam on medium, but it scorched anyway. The problem was that I was using my beautiful Le Creuset dutch oven. I had seen some photos on other blogs of people using their Le Creuset to make jam, so it didn't really occur to me that it was a Very Bad Idea. Even on medium heat, the jam scorched. I was panicked in a cold sweat, bad way. This beautiful cookware was a gift from my husband and I RUINED IT. I didn't tell him about it and I was frantically trying to figure out how I could replace it without his ever knowing. I ended up calling the good people at Le Creuset and they walked me through a method for cleaning the pot and it was saved. Take it from me, save yourself some potential heartache and use only your stainless steel cookware for canning.

Beware the Giant Canner
The Giant canner takes up a LOT of room on your stovetop...if it gets too close to a plastic knob, for instance...

You too could be looking at purchasing a replacement knob from Sears Parts Direct for around $30. Just a word to the wise.

Pay attention at the Farmer's Market
The modern American supermarket has taught us all that we can get anything any time. If you are buying fresh, local, seasonal ingredients for your canning, you must pay attention. For example, I was happily buying strawberries and cherries each week, eating them out of hand. One week I noticed there weren't any more. The land had moved on and I had not canned. You cannot assume that the item you want will still be available next week. Ask the growers what you can get when and pay attention to season produce charts produced by many of the markets themselves. You don't want to find yourself at the other side of a season of something you meant to preserve.

I hope you will learn from my mistakes. I'm off for the weekend, but will try to share some recipes next week. My inventory thus far is as follows:

4 pints Sweet Pickled Cherries
6 pints Pickled Peaches
5 half pints Blueberry Butter
7 half pints Peach Melba Jam
3 pints Peach Butterscotch Jam
5 half pints Apricot Orange Butter
3 pints Strawberry Lime Jam

Canning questions? Ask me or call the professionals at the Ball Kerr Canning Hotline: 1-800-240-3340

Canning Gear

2010-08-17T18:30:00.000-07:00

Yes, you can always "get by" with tools and equipment that are not top shelf, but the right tool for the job, whether it's hairstyling, home improvement, or cooking, makes a world of difference. It almost always impacts the quality of the finished product, not to mention the level of aggravation, time and skill required to do a job right. So it is with canning equipment.

Canning is a relatively low cost hobby. After you establish your set of tools, all you are buying is produce and sometimes replenishing your stash of jars, lids, and rings. I find that a lot of people give me back empty jars after they've finished the goodies (in hopes they will be returned full of something else yummy!). My only other expense is labels. I usually design my own labels and print them on full sheets of sticker paper, then cut them out individually for the jars.

Here is the canning gear I recommend for starting out:

Boiling water canner with rack. Yes, you can get along with a big stock pot with a dishtowel in the bottom of it, but you might want to use that stock pot to make a brine or something else to put in the jars.

funnel
jar lifter
lid wand
candy thermometer
jars, rings, lids

It's really not expensive. Well under fifty dollars for this entire batterie de cuisine. Other items I find helpful are lots of wooden spoons, ditto for clean dishtowels, saucers for the freezer, and wide, deep, heavy bottomed pots. Mostly, I use my 6 qt copper dutch oven and 12 qt stockpot. An inexpensive splatter screen is also useful for jam making.

I've also purchased a couple of books, Well Preserved , Perfect Preserves and the Ball Blue Book of Home Canning. Yes, you can get fun recipes from blogs and articles, but for a foundation, it's really essential to read beyond that. There are also always trendy new canning books on Amazon that I am usually able to pick up at my library.

Your next decision is jars and lids. I like to put jam in half pint jars because you gets lots of them out of a batch and they make a nice, small gift. If you are making big batches of something, consider 12 oz jars, or pints. I use pints for pickles and pickled fruits. Ball makes a beautiful new line called "Elite" but they are cost prohibitive for me. Also, if I were more skilled and money was no object, I might opt for the Weck jars, which are just beautiful.

I have not dipped my toe in the world of pressure canning, which is for low acid foods. Maybe next year.

Questions?

The Canning Life

2010-08-16T08:19:00.000-07:00

I started canning last summer. If you believe the mainstream media, this endeavor is enjoying a renaissance. It seems a natural outgrowth of the trend in home edible gardens and the backlash against factory farming. People want to know where their food comes from and what's in it.

Canning was something I had always wanted to learn and that I was exposed to peripherally, growing up. I think my aunt was the big canner in our family. I lived with her for eighteen months in college and foolishly did not seize the moment to learn a thing or two. My canning memories are of my mother, aunts, and grandma making and canning batches of mincemeat in my grandmother's kitchen. I never developed a taste for mincemeat, but it was a favorite of their generations. I don't know if ours was a proprietary recipe from my great grandmother's or where it came from or if anyone even still has it or any other family canning recipes. I'll have to ask my mom about it sometime (though she reads this blog, so she'll be forewarned and ready to talk about it!)

I wish I had had the opportunity to know my great grandmother; she died before I was born. It seems we shared many common interests including canning and quilting. But I digress. I don't think I appreciated a kitchen full of the women in my family working together on something so timeless. I wish I could be a fly on the wall of that kitchen, circa 1976, today.

My other canning memory involves italian plums. My grandparents had three mature italian plum trees in their yard. The sweet, dark fruit matured every August. One summer, I remember a friend of the family, a young man rented the studio apartment in the basement of my aunt's (formerly my great grandmother's) house. He was a culinary student and he made the most sublime fruit butter out of the italian plums. I've never forgotten the taste of that fruit butter and I'm going to try to re-create it later this month.

This officially kicks off canning week at suddenly sahm. Look for a new post each day as my pantry goes from empty jars to full ones. I love to give home canned treats as gifts. People always seem to look like you just gave them candy. In the meantime, here are some recent articles and sites that I look to for inspiration.

Anything you'd like to see posted here on canning week? Fire away!

Food In Jars

recent article in the LA Times

recent article in the Seattle Times

Washington State Fruit Commission

Saving the Season

From the blogs above, note the links on their sidebars and you can go down the rabbit trail of the blogosphere and get lost in canning blogs. See you tomorrow!

Blueberry Picking

2010-08-11T17:48:00.000-07:00

It's that time of year again! Blueberry picking always makes me think of "Blueberries for Sal" one of my all time favorite children's books.

This morning the kids and I joined Noelle and her brood at the Mercer Slough blueberry farm for a picking session followed by a picnic lunch on the shores of Lake Washington.

Sadly, my haul was only a little under two pounds, well short of the amount I need to make blueberry butter. I am hoping that I will be able to supplement my hand picked beauties with some from the farmer's market. If indeed I am, look for a post later this week on my crockpot blueberry butter. If not, there will probably be a picture of my kids stuffing themselves silly eating them out of hand.

While we're on the subject, commercial blueberries are one of the nasty offenders in the dirty dozen. The dirty dozen is the list of the commercially grown produce with the most pesticide residue. This is where you should concentrate your organic produce spending dollar. The clean fifteen is the list of the commercially grown produce that's safest to eat.

I recommend you print and clip this handy cheat sheet . I keep it in my wallet because I can never remember what's on each list!

Seinfeld

2010-08-09T19:44:00.000-07:00

Seinfeld was a show about nothing. This is a blog post about nothing. I see by monitoring my traffic that good people are coming to this blog expecting a moment's entertainment and yet there are no new posts.

Click away, my friends.

I could write about my glorious 48 hours alone in my house this weekend...the pedicure, the happy hour, the facial, the girl movies, etc.

or I could write about the awesome visit we had with sycamore stirrings and family and friends last Thursday.

or I could write about what I've been cooking:

grilled lemon chicken
my hummus
a new variation of black bean soup
fresh corn chowder
the yummy Ina Garten orzo and roasted veg salad

or I could write about my sadness over my neighborhood friend moving away

or I could write about canning (maybe tomorrow)

but the truth is, I just don't feel like it. Maybe tomorrow.

The Camp Counselor

2010-08-05T00:04:00.000-07:00

For some reason it has become harder to entertain/occupy my boys the last few days. Suddenly I don't know what to do with them and if I did, I don't know if I'd have the gumption to do it.

Things they want to do:

go for a bike ride
go to the pool
go to a turf field and play soccer
go to a diamond and play baseball
watch cartoons
play games on the computer
go out for lunch
go to the park

Things I want to do:

go for a bike ride
go for a walk
go shopping
sew
read
I don't even know

You see the paradox. Things we end up doing:

going for bike rides
going to the pool
watching cartoons
running through the sprinkler
mommy doing chores while they play Bakugon or Harry Potter or Battle Force Five
going to the library and Farmer's Market
going for the occasional letterbox

I've fallen and I can't get up. I know I should be organizing play dates and cool outings, but I'm just...not. What do you do when you fall into the camp counselor slump?

Quote for Today

2010-08-04T10:01:00.000-07:00

"It's no trick loving somebody at their best. Love is loving them at their worst."

Tom Stoppard, The Real Thing

Meatless Monday

2010-08-03T17:29:00.000-07:00

Okay, it's Tuesday. Meatless Monday was yesterday. But, hey, it's never too soon to start planning for next Monday!

This one's easy, but I only took one picture which makes me unbelievably lame. It is summer and we know I am lame in summer. Wait til fall. I'm awesome in the fall; it's my time, so to speak. Getting on with it. This is a stir fry.

1 14 oz. container firm or extra firm tofu, sliced into cubes
1 7 oz. package mushroom flavor udon noodles
~8 c. mixed chopped vegetables (I used a baby bok choy (stems and leaves) a handful of mushrooms, half of a white onion (sliced), small broccoli florets, sliced carrots, summer squash and red pepper.)

Separate the udon noodles and run them under hot water to soften slightly. Saute the veg. When it is about 2/3 there, add the tofu. About two minutes later add the udon noodles with water and seasoning packet as instructed on the package. Saute one more minute and serve. This makes four hearty servings. The tofu makes it more filling that a plain veggie stir fry.

Enjoy!

Twin Falls

2010-08-02T11:02:00.000-07:00

Beautiful day hike for families. About three miles roundtrip.

The Best of July

2010-07-31T20:25:00.000-07:00

Disneyland!

View from the deck, 4th of July

My boy turned eight!

Summer nights at the ballpark

Celebrating a personal best

Paradise, Mt. Rainier

9th anniversary (and I'd marry him all over again!)

I can't wait to see what adventure lies around the corner in August!

Budgeting Time and the SAHM

2010-07-30T10:42:00.000-07:00

Okay, maybe this post isn't sahm-specific, but I struggle a lot with budgeting my time and I wonder how other people do it. It's harder without work to give more structure and shape to your day, I think.

To start with, there's the never-ending to-do list. I keep my to-do list on a blank 3 x 5 card. I have about a gazillion of them that I bought when Tank was learning sight words. There are a half dozen things that have to be done every day and then there's everything else.

Also, on the reverse side of my card I keep a list of needful things to buy. As part of the Happiness Project, one thing I learned was the balance between buying a lot of junk you don't need and not buying things that would make your life easier. That balance is called buying "needful things". For example, night-light bulbs...I will need them for a few more years in Big Red's room, so why would I buy one when I will need them and I have room to store four of them. You get the idea. I always have my 3 x 5 card with me.

I have always considered exercise to be a bottom of the list thing...when I have done my chores, when I have finished everything else that needs to be done, if I have time, I will get to it. That doesn't work. Since I started running in the mornings when I fall out of bed, I don't have to worry about that anymore. The time for my health is a top priority and since I do it first thing, it doesn't even make it onto the list!

When I worked, I was very good at spending fifteen minutes lots of little things, like the evening tidy up. A messy house is depressing to me but I didn't have the energy for a full blown cleaning, so I would set the timer for 15 minutes and do what I could in that time. It didn't exhaust me and I felt better about things being picked up.

I used to do that with my sewing as well. I would give myself 15 or 20 minutes each day to make some progress on a project, but lately that too has fallen to the bottom of the list and I am making no progress.

Ditto for playing with my kids. If I don't consciously make time for it, I won't do it. They usually entertain themselves or each other. I'm always much happier when I make the time to play with them though. It's important. If I don't make it a priority, frankly, I probably won't do it. Playing is not my strong suit.

August 1st is going to be a re-calibration for me of how I spend my time and how I align my time with my priorities. We all have the same 24 hours a day and what you spend your time on shows you what your priorities are. What you do every day matters more than what you do every once in a while.

What are your time management strategies? How do you struggle or succeed with it?

Summer Grilled Chicken Dinner

2010-07-28T08:49:00.000-07:00

We all know that this has been a phenomenally lame season of cooking (or not) for me. On Sunday, when I was meal planning for the week, I asked the family if there was anything they wanted for dinner. The husband requested corn on the cob, so I built this meal around it. I think I have been redeemed... this is a meal for a family of four with a bit of leftovers depending on the appetites involved. Clockwise, from the top:

CORN: You actually don't have to cook it at all. I like my corn Very fresh and almost crunchy. These cobs spent eight minutes on the grill rolling around for even color. I don't soak it or slather it in anything; just shuck and grill. (6 ears for four people) Serve with butter and salt.

CHICKEN: this is a dry rub. (Yes, I blackened it a little). Cut up your chicken into eight pieces. I like to leave the wing attached to the breast and cut the breast in half. Rub with the following mixture:

1 3-4 lb. chicken, cut into eight pieces
2 T. Light brown sugar
1 t. chili powder
1 t. paprika
1 t. dry mustard
1 t. onion powder
dash cayenne pepper
1 t. salt (kosher or sea)
1 t. pepper

After 15 minutes, heat the grill on high. After the grill has preheated for 15 minutes, brush the grates and use long tongs to hold a wadded up paper towel that has been dipped in vegetable oil to coat the grates. (the chicken sits in the rub for a total of 30 minutes pre-grilling). Reduce heat to low and place chicken pieces skin side down on grill with larger pieces in the center. Close the lid. After 10-15 minutes, check it. Turn and close the lid. Temp it after another 10 minutes. White pieces should be 160, dark pieces 175. When finished, remove to platter and tent with foil while you finish preparing the meal. The chicken is really flavorful. You might be thinking about adding some bbq sauce at the end. DON'T. It's awesome as-is.

CILANTRO/LIME SLAW: this is pretty basic, but is my summer favorite. You can keep all your mayonnaise-y based fatty slaws. I like mine to be fresh and tangy.

1 bag coleslaw mix (the kind with the red cabbage and carrot in it) If you are an over-achiever, shred your own cabbage
1/2 bunch cilantro, chopped
3 green onions, thinly sliced

Mix the above in a bowl, then mix dressing in a separate bowl. Do not toss completed salad until inside 30 minutes from the meal.

juice of 1/2 lime
2/3 c. light sour cream
1/4 c. lowfat buttermilk
salt and pepper

That's it. You may need to adjust the dressing a bit by adding or reducing buttermilk to make it the proper consistency. Be careful not to over-salt this.

BAKED BEANS: I like to make mine with beer and bacon.

3 slices bacon, chopped~1 c. chopped onion (this was 1/2 lg red onion - use what you have)
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 t. chili powder (if you have chipotle, so much the better, but cut it by half)
3 14.5 oz cans beans, rinsed and drained (I like pinto (low sodium) and black, but do whatever you want)
1 bottle beer (I used a pale ale. Amber is also nice, lager isn't really appropriate here.)
3/4 c. ketchup or chili sauce (whatever you have)
1/3 c. brown sugar (light is better here)
2 T. Dijon
1 T. Worcestershire
pepper to taste at the end (this likely won't need any salt)

Saute the bacon until crisp. About halfway there add the onion. When the onion is golden, add the chili powder and garlic and cook for one minute until fragrant. Add everything else. Bring to a boil, reduce heat to low and simmer at least 20 minutes, uncovered, stirring frequently, until beans are thick and infused with flavor. If you need to thicken the sauce a little, add a little tomato paste. If it's too thick, add a little water.

This meal was a big hit with my family. It's doable on a weeknight as it's not that much labor and lots of things can be happening at the same time. Happy Summer!

Paradise

2010-07-26T09:11:00.000-07:00

This weekend we had a baseball game cancellation that left us with an entire free day. We decided to take advantage of the beautiful weather and do a day trip to Mt. Rainier. We drove to a point inside the Park and took the free shuttle to Paradise.

It was a really beautiful day, in the mid eighties at sea level and probably the low 70's on the mountain. When we hiked up into the snow, the sun warmed us and a very light breeze blowing across the surface of the snow was pleasantly cooling.

(that's Mt. Adams in the distance)

When we got off the shuttle bus, my intrepid husband just began climbing up...and up...and up. I was sort of thinking we should go in the Visitors' Center and look at the trail maps, but I just followed him. It was a pretty vertical climb and when we returned to the visitors' center we saw that the trail we took was one labeled "strenuous". I thought on Sunday I would be calling it "the ibuprofen trail" but the strengthening of my legs from running served me well and there were no ill after effects. It is also exciting that Big Red is getting older and we are able to go on longer explorations everywhere with him. I love this picture of Tank. He looks just like his father. Somewhere I have a picture almost exactly like this of him.

I took about 50 shots that day. This hike reminded me of some of the reasons I fell in love with my husband, why we need to get outside, and above all how important it can be to just drive away from a messy house and the demands of life with the ones you love and go see some of the wonders of the world.

Bernard Pivot's Questionnaire

2010-07-23T09:46:00.000-07:00

(Okay, that's Will Farrell, not James Lipton)

At the end of every episode of Inside the Actor's Studio, James Lipton submits the 'Bernard Pivot' questionnaire to his guest. My answers are below.

What is your favorite word? ennui
What is your least favorite word? three way tie between "chafe" "moist" and "slacks"
What turns you on? energy, mystery, color, intelligence
What turns you off? anger, stupidity, narrow-mindedness
What sound or noise do you love? my cat's purr
What sound or noise do you hate? my cat's voice between 11 pm and 7 am
What is your favorite curse word? it's a tie between "dumbass" and "douchebag"
What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? law, librarianship, travel agent
What profession would you not like to do? anything medical (ewww, gross)
If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? "Okay, we have a quorum, let's get started, shall we?"

Ponder your own answers...Happy Friday!

Craft Hope Project 8

2010-07-22T00:26:00.000-07:00

Many of you have shared with me offline that you've sent dozens of cloths to the gulf to help clean up. I wanted to let you know that you can follow Craft Hope's work on Facebook and also on their website. To date they have collected over 65,000 towels.

I fear we will be dealing with the repercussions of this disaster for generations. I just wanted to thank you if you joined me in supporting their efforts. Special shout outs to my mom, Mona, and Margaret. Grass roots is the way to change the world!

Peace out

Photography 'n stuff

2010-07-21T13:49:00.000-07:00

I am very excited to share with you that I've had a photo I took of The Seattle Public Library selected for inclusion in the schmap guide. They found it on Flickr and approached me a couple of months ago to let me know that it was under consideration. They requested permission to use it and I just got the notification that it was selected.

I don't expect to be earning a living taking photos anytime soon, but I am happy to see my skills and my "eye" improving. My classes are finished, but I'd like to find time to review my notes and experiment more. This is the photo that was selected by Schmap:

I didn't even really think it was one of my best. Here are some of my favorite photos from my brother's wedding last weekend where I took about 150 shots.

Let's just say that aperture is a tough nut to crack and leave it at that!

summer nights at the ballpark

2010-07-20T07:59:00.000-07:00

Run Jeny Run

2010-07-18T10:01:00.000-07:00

So, the husband and I don't watch a ton of tv. For some strange reason, last winter we got started watching The Biggest Loser: Couples. And we got totally sucked in. We watched it every week. At the end of the season in May, the contestants ran a marathon. One of the guys, Daris, ran it pretty fast and set a new record for their course and program. I was riveted and I found watching him to be tremendously inspiring.

I have never thought of myself as a runner. I am the girl who ran with Girl Scout cookies in my pockets when I was a kid. I am the person who says things like "I only run when chased." I smoked for ten years (in my rebellious youth). I always say I can't function without a cup of coffee first in the morning.

Daris inspired me to run. One day, idly surfing, I came upon the couch to 5k running plan on coolrunning.com. I thought to myself that if that super heavy kid can run a marathon, then I could run too. So I did.

I started getting up at six (or sometimes 5:30!) and rolling out of bed to run. Religiously. I laid my clothes out the night before. I bought fancy shoes. I stretched. I put podcasts on my ipod. I bought a visor. And then I put my money down on the table so I wouldn't back out. I registered for a run.

The couch to 5k program is nine weeks long with three training sessions per week. I printed it out, put on my sneakers and went outside. That was nine weeks ago. Yesterday morning, I ran my first 5k in 32 minutes, 23 seconds. I ran the entire way. My husband and children came with me and cheered me on as I entered the last leg and crossed the finish line.

People, I am not an athlete. I am a 40 year old mother of two who is twenty something pounds overweight. But I did something that I couldn't have done nine weeks ago and never in my life thought I would do; I ran three miles.

I didn't tell anyone that I was doing it. I could hardly believe that it would really happen. I've found something that makes me feel good in a variety of ways and that brings me a curious peace. I'm not stopping and now I can say I am a runner.

Would You Like Fresh Ground Pepper?

2010-07-16T00:28:00.000-07:00

This is the question we are asked by the polite waiter seconds after the salad has been placed before us. He is no doubt wielding something resembling an eighteenth century tool of war approximately three feet long with which he will bestow the pepper.

I am a self-described Pepper Monkey. LOVE the stuff. Can't get enough. I had a very fine mill and shaker set by Peugot that I purchased when I first entered into the food biz about seventeen years ago. Sadly, over the last few months, the product the mill turned out was rather sub-par. The grinding mechanism was dulled from years of being strangled to within an inch of its life in my fists. It was time for a new pepper mill.

The husband and I wanted a wood six inch set in the classic style for the table. Mill and shaker. It turns out that is increasingly hard to find. The current fashion seems to be that everyone also wants a salt mill on the table. Pish posh. Though I am not a fan of table salt (I find it acrid), I am a traditionalist about having a shaker on the table for salt. Not a mill.

It took some searching, but we eventually found a set suitable for the table. The problem is that the grinding mechanism isn't fabulous. Okay, not fabulous enough for me. I wanted a larger mill for cooking. A real tool of the trade. Enter my beautiful, as yet unnamed new friend. Behold:

The Walnut Mario Batali 12" Vic Firth Pepper Mill. I ordered her from the fine folks at Dick's Restaurant Supply (one of my favorite stores). It took her over two months to arrive, but I picked her up at the store the other day. She is so fine, she makes the rest of my kitchen look shabby.

Vic Firth pepper mills are special because they produce the widest range of grinds available from coarse to fine. It is a product made in America of the highest quality and I give it my ringing endorsement. Plus, I think you get better pricing if you buy it from a restaurant supply store.

We are still getting to know one other, but I am certain that we will have many happy years together.

The End ;)

Wheatberry Salad (with shrimp)

2010-07-15T10:28:00.000-07:00

Sigh. Okay, okay, I get the picture. You really only love me for my cooking. That's fine, no worries. I'm here for you.

Knowing how I feel about summer food, you know I also can't just go three months without eating. Though that would be awesome for my bod. Enough; let's get to it. You could double this if you were making salad for a crowd. This is about 4 smallish-medium size servings.

1 c. wheatberries
juice of one lime
olive oil (1/2 the amount of the lime juice)
1/3 English cucumber, quartered lengthwise and sliced ~1/3 in thick
1 orange, red or yellow pepper, chopped
1/4 large red onion, minced
3 c loosely packed spinach leaves
1 lb cooked shrimp, preferably marinated

Bring 3 c salted water to a boil. Add wheatberries and return to boil. Reduce to low and simmer for about 45 minutes. Drain. On the left, uncooked; on the right, cooked.

While wheatberries cook, chop the veg. For the spinach, your goal is a chiffonnade. You can accomplish this by rolling up groups of leaves like a cigar then slicing them thinly across (no more than 1/4")

Toss wheatberries with veg, lime juice, olive oil and salt and pepper. I served the salad with the shrimp scattered on top. I used the Lime marinated cooked shrimp you can buy at Costco.

It's eight or nine dollars for around a pound, but you need to use it within a day or two of purchase.

You could add some cheese, but I didn't really feel it was appropriate here. You could switch out the shrimp for chopped grilled chicken or??? You could carmelize then cool the onion to give the salad a sweet smoky flavor. You could change up the veg and add some herbs. A chopped avocado would be nice here. The possibilities are endless.

Questions? Ideas?

Ten Dollar Drawings

2010-07-14T00:11:00.000-07:00

Long time readers of this blog will remember this post from last winter.

Yours truly went through a rather rough patch, but seems to have emerged on the other side better, faster, stronger (oh, wait, that's not me, that's the Bionic Woman). Anyhoo...

The hard thing I had to do was testify in a trial. It brought up painful memories and I was very much struggling. And that's all I'm going to tell you.

Curiously, about six weeks after my court date, I received a check in the mail from the county in the amount of ten dollars. For my testimony. ten dollars. HAHAHAHAHA. I would much rather have paid them twenty dollars to NOT receive that check in the mail, but there it is.

I decided I would do something special for myself with this highly symbolic ten dollars. Of course, you can't do much with ten dollars, but I gave it some critical thought and research and then I stumbled on this.

I sent in my money with my request for a short, chubby, modern owl (my power animal). This was mid-April. Two months went by and it occurred to me that I had not received my drawing, so I emailed the artist. She assured me that she had mailed it "a while ago" (artist style). There was no tracking number, etc. I waited. I stewed. I fretted.

I gave up hope.

And then last Friday it came.

This very talented artist in Portland will make you a 5 x 7 drawing of whatever you request for ten dollars. Including shipping. She does them in charcoal pencils on Trader Joe's paper shopping bags. I think she does bigger ones (8 x 10) for a higher charge, but the gig is called "ten dollar drawings".

She mailed it on June 1st, but they couldn't read my zip code, so it didn't arrive until July 9th. From Portland to Seattle. Go figure.

I read recently on her site that she is slowing down and may stop altogether the production of these drawings as she really is creating beautiful, original works of art for less than minimum wage. I can't say I blame her, but I'm very happy I have my drawing.

Yesterday, I framed it in a distressed white wood frame with a lavender mat. It will hang in my sewing room and it's purpose is to be a daily reminder for me of my own strength, courage, and fortitude.

Will Somebody Please Make Me Dinner?

2010-07-13T00:01:00.000-07:00

I am in an off cycle. a slump. What can I do to not have to prepare a meal? It gets tedious being the manager of a 24 hour cafeteria/pantry. Not very often. but it happens.

Summer isn't really my food season. Summer meals require no real skill or finesse. All you have to do is try to buy the freshest, most perfectly ripe produce and try not to screw it up. It's pretty hard to screw it up but surprising common to run across. Salads...yeah yeah yeah. Yes it's all light and fresh and colorful and blah blah blah. Grilling...because the food prep has moved outside, suddenly Johnny Grill Man is the epicure in the house (or on the patio) puh-leez. Get that hockey puck you call a burger out of my sight and go get yourself another beer. There's no debate in my house. We're not big into grilling (gasp!) but when we do, it's still my job.

In summer, there's no braising, no stewing, no roasting...it just doesn't do it for me. I just don't care much about summer food and right about now I am doing everything in my power to get out of preparing meals for my family. You may think this flies in the face of everything you know about me. Well, SURPRISE!

I guess I'll give you a little something for having read this lame post. My summer salads tend to be grain based. I am a big fan of both bulgur and wheatberries (and sometimes whole wheat pasta). Basically, you cook them up then add some veg, maybe some crumbly cheese and dress it in some sort of vinaigrette. I believe they should be served room temp, not ice cold and are better at least twelve hours after prepared. Easy-peasy. Sometimes I add a little flaked high quality tuna, grilled chicken, or shrimp. Okay, I'll try to put together a photo and a proper recipe for you this week. But know that I cannot wait for the return of meatloaf and pork chops season.

I guess that's enough of my little rant for today...guess I'll go make a salad. Here's some fresh ideas from Nancy.

Wait, what are you having? My tribe and I will be over six-ish. I'll bring a nice chilled Chardonnay. Hey, I might even kick in an appetizer...

Riding In Cars With Boys

2010-07-12T09:12:00.000-07:00

Something new in our lives as of the last 48 hours...older boy not in a car seat. weird.

He is the youngest in his crowd and caught wind from his friends that they have all abandoned the booster seat. He knows about the law, and I will NEVER get that kid back in his booster. He's just sitting there. in the car. on the seat. It is the strangest thing to me.

Car seats have been an integral part of our lives for the last eight years, from the day we brought him home in the baby purse bucket type seat to the barcalounger recliner type convertible seat, to the booster with back to the booster with no back to finally...nothing.

I thought I knew the law in our state was booster until age eight. I seem to have also thought there was something about eighty pounds, but alas, I looked it up again and eight years old it is (or 4'9", whichever comes first). He is 4'7".

It's a whole new world. It also occurred to me that as of yesterday, we are officially half way to him holding out his hand and asking for the car keys. I can't think about that or it might give me an aneurysm.

Happy Monday!

The Last Airbender

2010-07-11T09:14:00.000-07:00

Laying on a blanket in the shade with a book. That's my boy.

It was about this time eight years ago today that the doctor started talking about "forceps". At this point I gathered all the strength in every fiber of my being and pushed him into the world. He made me a mother.

Yesterday, he took some of his buddies to see The Last Airbender, followed by a water balloon fight in our backyard, "water bending", and make-your-own-ice-cream-sundaes.

Every year, on my children's birthdays, their father and I each write them a letter. We do not read each others letters and the boys do not yet know of the letters' existence. They are sealed with the boy's name and the year written on the front and kept in the safe.

When we think they are old enough, they will get their packet of letters as a gift on their birthday. Something tells me it will be like their 25th birthday!

I've been thinking a lot about what I am going to put in his birthday letter this year. It seems like he has grown up so much recently. This is the joy and the heartache of parenthood. They cannot be yours forever. You get to launch them into the world and marvel at their accomplishments. You get to comfort them in their hard times and all the while they are slowly but surely moving distinctly away from you.

He is not my baby anymore, but the baby he was will always be with me. I love the boy he is and the man he will become more with each (quickly!) passing day.

I'm Ba-ack

2010-07-08T08:27:00.000-07:00

I'm back, but it's hot and I'm still repatriating. Here are some photo highlights from our trip.

LOVE this...waiting for the plane:

A rare picture with me in it...something you don't often see here. (I gave Hubby the point and shoot)

My Goofies with Goofy (Disneyland)

It's a Small World, after all

Look out drivers, everywhere! (Legoland)

Family beach house at Dana Point...I have to tell you...this.didn't.suck. That's Big Red with his new best friend in the bottom corner...2nd cousin. They were thick as thieves the whole time.

Hubba hubba...

My MIL meditating on the beach

Three generations of boogie borders (Big Red called it surfing)

It was so warm and so beautiful that I never wanted to leave. This was the most relaxing part of our trip.

More later! As Tigger would say, "TTFN, ta ta for now! Hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo!"

See you in July!

2010-06-28T18:27:00.000-07:00

Okay, not so much...but we're not going here either...then...why...is...this...picture...of...?

Because I am a dufus and I ordered THE WRONG HATS!!! Oh well, I'm starting to get over it. Alas, one of my sons can read. C'est la vie!

Back next week.

The Happiest Place on Earth - no brass knuckles allowed

2010-06-27T10:04:00.000-07:00

We are preparing for a trip to you know where. It is a surprise to our boys. We are leaving in two days and we are only going to tell them the morning of...with monogrammed "ear" hats that we ordered for them.

Anyhoo, as we took a look at their website (which is poorly designed) we came upon the list of prohibited items...I thought I would share it with you as many of them are hysterical. I think my favorite might be "no cremated remains"...without further ado...

Items not permitted include, but are not limited to:

* Pets (Service Animals are permitted and must be wearing an identifying assistive-companion vest; pets may be kept at the on-site kennel)

* Wagons, skateboards, scooters (motorized and nonmotorized), inline skates, shoes with built-in wheels, bicycles, motorcycles, tricycles, unicycles, pogo sticks, two-wheeled vehicles, including bicycles and Segway™ Human Transporters

* Strollers larger than 36" x 52" (which mirrors the rental stroller sizes)

* Suitcases, backpacks or similar bags with wheels

* Suitcases, backpacks or similar bags larger than 18"w x 25"h x 37"d (which mirrors the large locker sizes). Lockers are available on a first-come, first-served basis.

* Any trailer-like object that is pushed or towed by an ECV, wheelchair or stroller
       o Note: Guests are not permitted to pull items behind them. Any item that requires a Guest to pull it behind him, including a stroller, is not permitted into the Theme Parks.

* Coolers larger than six-pack sized are not permitted into the theme parks.
          o Note: Guest can store coolers up to 18"w x 25"h x 37"d in picnic lockers located outside the Disneyland® Park Main Entrance. Lockers are not refrigerated and availability is limited. Guests who need to refrigerate medication may do so at First Aid.
          o Exceptions may be made for special dietary or religious needs.

* Alcoholic beverages and any illegal substances

* Folding chairs, with the exception of cane-chair and seat-walker mobility aids

* Glass containers, with the exception of baby food containers, medicine or small perfume bottles (under 4 oz)

* Costumes on Guests older than age 9 (except during special events that permit children up to age 12 to wear costumes)

* Water pistols, toy guns and replica weapons, with the exception of those sold in the Disneyland® Resort

* Sporting goods or equipment (e.g., baseball bats, helmets, hockey sticks, golf clubs, bows and arrows, camping equipment, chairs, stools, tables, Frisbees)

* Weapons of any kind (including guns; knives; billy clubs; brass knuckles; and nunchucks, stars and other martial arts equipment)

* Self-defense equipment (pepper spray, mace, stun guns)

* Restraining devices (e.g., handcuffs, zip ties) or any suspicious items (e.g., box cutters, razor blades, duct tape, wire)

* Items that may be disruptive (e.g. laser pointer, slingshot, stink bomb, air horns)

* Cremated remains (e.g., urn, vase, box)

* Miscellaneous other items (tools, fire extinguishers, musical instruments, megaphones, pots and pans)

* Professional cameras and recording equipment. (Reporters must make prior arrangements with Disneyland® Resort Media Relations.) Folding tripod stands that can fit inside a standard backpack are permitted.

There you have it - going to Disneyland? Put away your air rifles and stink bombs and leave the fun to the professionals.

The Too Long Post Title

2010-06-26T12:57:00.000-07:00

""Things I never knew and still don't understand about boys"

Are you ready?

Whatever sport my menfolk happen to be watching, they are compelled to play.

My husband is not a huge sports tv watcher, but he will watch the playoffs of anything and he watches a lot of golf. Are you still awake? As I said, whatever they are watching, they must do. For example, halftime, they will shoot baskets if it's the nba playoffs, as is the case with the superbowl and touch football, etc., etc., etc.

What is particularly entertaining is Tank during a baseball game. Which has no halftime. He makes it about four innings, then can't sit still any longer and must go throw himself baseballs.

Today, of course, it is the World Cup game of Ghana vs. U.S. They had to play some soccer in the backyard during the break. Is it testosterone?

I truly could not be less interested but, incidentally, I am the only one in our house rooting for Ghana. What can I say, I like an underdog. This is me playing with a slow shutter speed...

Persuasion

2010-06-25T08:15:00.000-07:00

"Miss Elliot, I can bear this no longer. You pierce my soul. I'm half agony, half hope. Unjust I may have been. Weak and resentful I have been, but never inconstant. I offer myself to you again with a heart even more your own than when you almost broke it eight years ago."

Melissa saw the smokin' hot Captain Wentworth on her trip to London!

summa summa summa time

2010-06-24T08:41:00.000-07:00

FINALLY. Finally there are golden orbs in the forecast. I was on the ledge. Another day of grey, cold, damp and I was about to jump. The universe heard my cry and it is sunny. Ahhhhhhh.

As sometimes happens when one is busily enjoying life, one's blog does not get updated. C'est la vie. I feel like the cartoon character Phineas of Phineas and Ferb...what are we going to do today?

Summer time presents a new set of challenges and rewards for the stay at home mom. There is really only one challenge as far as I can see and that is the "when do I run errands? will I ever shop alone again?" challenge.

Taking my boys to the grocery store or similar is so unpleasant there aren't words to describe it. I actually got two hours of babysitting from the girl down the street the other day for just such a purpose. It's hard to balance doing the fun stuff and doing the stuff that must get done...housekeeping, cooking, lawn mowing, etc. Not to mention doing stuff that isn't about entertaining children or keeping the ship afloat. The stuff that keeps mommy sane.

I get that my life feels totally privileged right now; that I get to dabble in my little projects, etc. but something tells me this needs to get scaled back just a bit. I am trying to do too many things at once. (One of which is a big secret, but I'm very excited about it.)

So, the current struggle is trying to find a rhythm for the summer and balance all the balls (no pun intended). The boys and I are keeping summer journals and I don't want the entries at the end of every day to be "today we went to Fred Meyer and bought light bulbs." But alas, the light bulbs must be purchased.

My goal is to do at least one (preferably two) really fun, random things every day. So, I better get going and plan some fun! Enjoy the sunshine.

Happy Father's Day

2010-06-21T11:16:00.000-07:00

We had a lovely brunch at Ivar's Salmon House then were incapable of doing much for the rest of the day. Tank ate about three pounds of bacon. I got my man a new 18v cordless drill. (Insert man grunts). He was delighted.

Here's to the father of my children and the man who makes all my dreams come true. He really should get more than one day a year.

Feel Helpless In The Face Of The Oil Spill??? Read on.

2010-06-18T07:36:00.000-07:00

Who among us can look at that picture and not have your stomach turn? I am going to make this short and sweet because I want us all to get to work.

Craft Hope has started project 8. The idea is to send much needed washcloths to the cleanup area to be used to help clean up the birds and other wildlife. WE CAN HELP TOO!!!

They have partnered with several animal welfare/environmental organizations to help clean up dolphins, sea turtles, cranes, and other birds and mammals.

What to do:
They need sets of hand towels or washrags, preferably sets of ten or twenty. Approximate dimensions? 10 x 10 or 14 x 27. The link above has more information and an FAQ, but that's basically all you need to know. They should be cotton but don't need to be handmade or fancy.

Send them to:

Kimberly Davion

c/o IMMS Oil Spill Relief

1700 East La Rua Street

Pensacola, FL 32501
USA

A key here is that they need them NOW. The deadline is July 3rd. If you participate, please leave me a comment on this post that you did and what you sent. The spill has become the worst environmental disaster in U.S. history. You can help; enlist your kids for a meaningful project to start off their Summer break.

Thanks everyone, and I hope you decide to join me. Jen

Light Writing

2010-06-16T09:16:00.000-07:00

I had looked into photography classes several months ago and all I could find locally were ones at the community college that were scheduled oddly and very expensive. I think there is a business opportunity here.

The store where I bought my camera offers a large selection of free classes when you purchase a camera. I have been attending these classes for a little over a month and they have gotten better and better. I really like the instructor, there are lots of good little tidbits of information and the classes are small enough that you can get your questions answered.

They also offer "excursions" where you sign up to go somewhere scenic and instructors come and work with you on taking the photos with your camera and help you apply what you've learned in class. I've signed up to go on two of these in the Fall.

At any rate, one of my girlfriends who is also into photography, came along with me to class last night. As we were leaving, we saw a spectacular rainbow. Of course I pulled over, we hopped out and took a bunch of photos. The one above was my favorite shot.

(Marissa, post your favorite rainbow shot and I'll link to it!)

I hope we will all start to see a dramatic improvement in my photos from what I am learning in the classes. Keep your fingers crossed!

Fire Roasted Tomato Bisque

2010-06-15T09:10:00.000-07:00

I seem to be going through a red soup phase. Last week it was red lentil, this week it's the tomato bisque...what's next? Gazpacho? Roasted Red Pepper? Hmmm. I'm also pretty bored with my 'soup photography'. I mean, how many bowls of soup can you look at? How do you make a bowl of soup look interesting?

Fire roasted tomatoes seem like one of those faddish things like calling everything pomegranate or chipotle. Ah, well, the tomatoes taste good, so who am I to judge? I think the Muir Glen brand are nice and as you can see, I got $1 off for buying two cans! This soup is super easy (pun intended).

I served it with a salad and cheater foccacia made with whole wheat pizza dough from Trader Joe's. If you are trying to do a Meatless Monday, this meal is a good bet. The soup would also be nice with some grilled cheese sandwiches, like gouda or mozz and basil or something. Okay, as Burning Pasta would say, let's get to it. You need:

2 14 oz cans fire roasted crushed tomatoes
1 14 oz can chicken stock
1/2 large onion, diced
1 T. butter
1 T. oil (olive or veg is fine)
1 T tomato paste
1 t. anchovy paste
1/3 - 1/2 c cream

Sweat the onion in the oil and butter over med-low heat until translucent. At this point you can add a crushed garlic clove or two if that's your thing. As we've established previously, I am lazy so there is no garlic in mine.

Add the two cans of tomatoes, the can of chicken stock and another half can of water. I usually swirl the chicken stock in the tomato cans to make sure I get all of it into the soup. Add the tomato paste and the anchovy paste. Stir. Bring to a boil and reduce to a pretty active simmer (medium heat) for 20-30 minutes, stirring occasionally. You want the flavors to meld and for it to reduce and thicken ever so slightly. At this point, remove from heat and grab that immersion blender. (I told you you'd want one). You don't want this super fine, but blend to your liking. Then stir in the cream. Return it to low heat for five minutes and add fresh ground pepper and sea salt to your taste.

A note on anchovy paste. Anchovy paste brings a brightness and complexity to lots of things other than caesar dressing, so I highly recommend you keep a tube in your fridge at all times. I like to add it to soups and pasta sauces among other things. Other tubes you should keep in your fridge are of course tomato paste and pesto (gasp! yes, pesto).

Easy-peasy. This is a pretty standard soup formula that could be adapted lots of ways. Ideas?

25 Things To Do In The Kitchen

2010-06-14T09:46:00.000-07:00

One of the reasons I love the kitchen is that it is the heart of the home. Other than bed, it is probably the place in my home where I spend the most time. When we moved into our home we renovated the kitchen: we painted, put new window treatments in, got all new appliances, installed granite counters and my husband lovingly refinished the cabinets. We bought this big, six seat farmhouse table and I LOVE my kitchen. I still want to put a tile backsplash in and a fixture to replace the can lights over the table.

There is always something to be done in the kitchen. Since we all spend so much time there, I thought I'd give you a list of 25 Things To Do In The Kitchen...in no particular order:

clean out a drawer
organize a cabinet
sharpen knives
clean up recipes
plan a meal
pull out food for food drive
wipe out microwave, fridge, front of appliances
clean oven
boil sponge (boiling a sponge for five minutes is the most effective way to clean it)
sanitize sink (with bleach solution)
put out fresh towels
stage the next pot of coffee
take out garbage/recycling/compost
check backstock of paper goods, organize pantry
throw out old ice cubes
empty toaster crumbs
check accuracy of thermometers (in a pan of boiling water, it should read 212 F, if not, calibrate with needle nose pliers)
keep a journal of meals and your comments with your recipes so you know what you made when and for whom you made it.
sweep floor/shake out rugs
clean vegetable bins (try a new vegetable each week!)
hide candy in empty frozen vegetable bags in freezer (children will never check here) ;)
tear recipes to keep out of old magazines and discard/donate magazines
make a dessert
cut up fruit and vegetables and put in containers ready to eat in the fridge
make a wish list of kitchen gadgetry you'd like to outfit your kitchen.

I hope you enjoyed my kitchen to do list. What would you add to it?

Happiness Tools

2010-06-11T23:59:00.000-07:00

That's a photo I took last summer on the Oregon Coast at Cannon Beach. I LOVE the ocean. It is my happy place, so it was only appropriate that it be the pic on this post. Don't worry, I'll get back to sewing and cooking and gardening soon. It has been a very rainy, cold, nasty May and June which lends itself to a lot of indoor ruminations.

Though I've removed the photo of the book on the bottom right, I've added The Happiness Project to my links list on the left. I highly recommend her book; it is crammed with interesting research and many ideas for both small and large ways that you can be happier in the life you are in. It is inspiring.

The author, Gretchen Rubin, has several tools she's put together including Secrets of Adulthood, personal commandments, true rules, resolutions chart, one sentence journal, etc. I liked many of these and I sort of combined some of them with some of my own into a list that I don't quite have a name for. Maybe I'll just call it Jen's list.

There were also a few idioms that I think ring true such as whatever you think about on the toilet is what you really want to do and what you do every day matters more than what you do every once in a while. She has many suggestions to get you started on your own happiness project.

Without further ado and in no particular order, here is my list:

Be Jen.
If you can't decide whether or not to bring something with you, bring it, you will inevitably want it.
Everything ends and that's okay
Go outside
Have goals
Keep looking forward
Expect a miracle
I am already enough
Choose not to take things personally
This too shall pass
What would I do if I weren't scared?
Start where you are
Help is everywhere
Keep it simple
Be a haven
People give what they have to give
I will never be done
Play the hand I'm dealt
Whenever possible, eat vegetables
Always choose the bigger life
Say hello first
The first thing isn't the right thing

What goes on your list?

Red Lentil Soup

2010-06-10T23:59:00.000-07:00

This is adapted from a soup we used to make at Pasta and Co. that was in the By Request cookbook.

2T cooking oil
1 onion, diced
1 carrot, chopped fine
2 ribs celery, chopped fine
2 cloves garlic
1 t. coriander
2 t. cumin
1/2 t. turmeric
1/4 t. red pepper flakes
1 c red lentils
2 T. tomato paste
14 oz can crushed tomatoes (or 2 c.)
4 c. water
1 bunch cilantro, chopped
2 T. fresh lemon juice

As always, my amounts are approximate ;).

Sweat the onion, celery and carrot in the oil over low heat in a large heavy pot. When onions are almost translucent add garlic, stir until fragrant (1 min.) Add coriander, cumin, turmeric, red pepper flakes and stir to distribute. Add red lentils and stir to coat. Add both tomatoes and water. Bring to boil, reduce to simmer. Simmer on low for ~30 minutes, stirring occasionally, or until lentils are completely tender and falling apart.

At this point you can leave it on a really really low burner for a while if you need to. I have a "simmer" burner on my gas cooktop for just such a purpose. When you are ~5-10 minutes from eating, stir in the chopped cilantro (save a little for garnish if you feel fancy) and the lemon juice. After a few minutes, taste for seasoning, add salt and fresh ground pepper to your taste.

I like to serve this with the aforementioned fancy cilantro, a dollop of yogurt, and warm naan.

Tasty, high fiber, low fat, vegetarian dinner. Go forth and make soup in June! (especially if it is raining without end for you like it is here...)

Personal Quotes

2010-06-10T02:22:00.000-07:00

Every now and then, my mind turns to the idea that I should have a personal quote. One that sums me up or at least gives an insight to me. There are a couple I've been considering. One is this:

"The true measure of a society is how it treats its weakest members". There are many variations of it ascribed to Ghandi, Samuel Johnson, and Winston Churchill, to name a few. I think this is the winner; it's the one I come back to again and again. Another one I like a lot is:

"Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good." -Voltaire

I also looked up a list of Winston Churchill quotes and he has several that I like a LOT. I've now decided that if I could have dinner with any person living or dead, it would be Churchill. Here's a sampling of his genius:

"Once in a while you will stumble upon the truth but most of us manage to pick ourselves up and hurry along as if nothing had happened."

"We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give."

"You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life."

"Those who can win a war well can rarely make a good peace and those who could make a good peace would never have won the war."

Looking for awesome quotes? This is the tome. Already have one? Do tell.

Iron Jawed Angels

2010-06-09T12:04:00.000-07:00

This is post 2 of 2 on strong women in history (that I never heard of) fighting for their rights.

Last week, my mom sent me a chain email that she received from somewhere. I see no copyrights, so I'll re-post most of it. It is about an American woman suffragete (sp?) Alice Paul and the effort to get women the vote in 1920. Here are some excerpts of that email:
___________________________________________
The women were innocent and defenseless, but they were jailed nonetheless for picketing the White House, carrying signs asking for the vote.

Forty prison guards wielding clubs and their warden's blessing went on a rampage against the 33 women wrongly convicted of 'obstructing sidewalk traffic.'

They beat Lucy Burns, chained her hands to the cell bars above her head and left her hanging for the night, bleeding and gasping for air.

They hurled Dora Lewis into a dark cell, smashed her head against an iron bed and knocked her out cold. Her cellmate, Alice Cosu, thought Lewis was dead and suffered a heart attack. Additional affidavits describe the guards grabbing, dragging, beating, choking, slamming, pinching, twisting and kicking the women.

Thus unfolded the 'Night of Terror' on Nov. 15, 1917, When the warden at the Occoquan Workhouse in Virginia ordered his guards to teach a lesson to the suffragists imprisoned there because they dared to picket Woodrow Wilson's White House for the right to vote.

For weeks, the women's only water came from an open pail. Their food--all of it colorless slop--was infested with worms.

When one of the leaders, Alice Paul, embarked on a hunger strike, they tied her to a chair, forced a tube down her throat and poured liquid into her until she vomited. She was tortured like this for weeks until word was smuggled out to the press.
______________________________________
More Information.

HBO has made a movie out of the story called Iron Jawed Angels. It's available on Netflix now. More from the email:
____________________________________
It is jarring to watch Woodrow Wilson and his cronies try to persuade a psychiatrist to declare Alice Paul insane so that she could be permanently institutionalized. And it is inspiring to watch the doctor refuse. Alice Paul was strong, he said, and brave. That didn't make her crazy. The doctor admonished the men: 'Courage in women is often mistaken for insanity.
____________________________________

It infuriates me that I am finding out about these things by chance and this late in life. Girls need to learn about more women who did extraordinary things as part of their general history courses.

And that, my friends is the end of my feminist rant for today...back to regularly scheduled programming tomorrow, but I hope you learned something new too and have some food for thought.

Raising Good Feminists

2010-06-08T09:10:00.000-07:00

Whenever I find out about some hellraising woman in history that I never heard of before it makes me angry that I didn't know. How many are there? Whenever this happens I usually think back to 6th grade when we had to do a biography of a famous person, dress up like them, act like them, etc. I was Eleanor Roosevelt. I always think I wish I would have known about more of these women, so I had more choices.

I worry, raising boys, about all the subtle messages they receive that girls are somehow less than boys. I guess if I had girls, I might worry even more. I take every opportunity to instruct and model for them that women can do anything men can do and in some cases they can do it better. They hear things like "run like a girl" or "throw like a girl" all the time in our society. Sometimes, if I refer to a senator or doctor or judge, they automatically assume it's a man. I am swimming against the current.

I've come across two examples of hellraising women lately and I'll write about the first one today. I'm working through a list of sports books recommended by the library for Tank. Every week I put three or four on hold for him. I have to be careful because about 25% of them are about female athletes. I worry that he will pick it up and then just put it down again and not read it. So when I get those I don't get more than one at a time and I try to talk about it with him. This week I got a book called Mighty Jackie, The Strikeout Queen.

Baseball books about girls are the best because baseball is his favorite thing and that makes the topic both accessible and relevant for him. Sunday morning, after a big breakfast, we all piled in to our bed and Tank read the book to all of us and then we talked about it. It is the true story of a woman named Jackie Mitchell who was only 17 years old, 130 pounds, and 5’7” tall, when she struck out two legendary batters in a row – Babe Ruth and Lou Gehrig!

It was fascinating. On the back cover of the book it said "On June 23, 1952, organized baseball formally banned women from the minor leagues." Wow. The boys saw that this was wrong all on their own. What was shocking to me is how recent it was.

The NCAA college women's softball playoffs have been on tv lately. I asked my husband why women play softball instead of baseball and he said it is because of the way women's shoulders are built. They can't throw overhand as hard and fast as they can throw underhand. Maybe. But maybe it's because they weren't allowed to play baseball and they had to find an alternative. I don't know; I'm no sports historian.

What I do know is that this was an important conversation with my boys. I told them that there have been lots of things that women haven't been allowed to do...like vote. And that there are still places in the world where women aren't allowed to have jobs or go to school or drive cars.

I'm not an athlete; I'm kind of a girly girl, so I have to work extra hard at setting my feminist example. I think it was easier when I worked. My mom set the first example for me of a hellraising woman. She's a feminist, she has always worked (which was a huge influence on me), and she never takes any crap from anyone. One way I try to set my example with my boys is every chance I get I grab my glove and go out and play ball with them.

Tomorrow I'll post about the other hellraising feminist I recently became aware of. Do you discuss or model gender equality in your family? How?

Bye Bye Mama and Papa

2010-06-06T23:54:00.000-07:00

Saturday, after the "two header" (that's what he called his double header), Tank was invited over to play at a friend's house with some of the other boys. We were elated as our boy sometimes struggles with his peer relationships and making friends. I picked him up a couple of hours later and he was quiet in the car on the way home. Suddenly he said to me "I'm going to start calling you Mom and Papa, Dad." After a beat, I said, "Okay, you call us whatever you like, that's fine...why the change?" "Because Mama and Papa are more babyish and I'm older now so I'm going to start calling you Mom and Dad."

Cue a little piece of my heart cracking.

I don't think anyone made fun of him; I think he just observed the other boys referring to their parents...

I have no idea why, but Tank and Big Red have always called us "Mama" and "Papa". I'm sure that if I heard this in another family I would think it was totally gay and stupid, but since they've always done it, it feels completely natural to me.

I guess my big boy is growing up...what's next? No holding hands with me in public? No blowing me kisses at school dropoff? No coming to tell me what position he's playing every inning?

It seems like I've always been in a hurry for my boys to grow up and now...well, I'm not so sure I'm ready. But I guess he is. You go from this:

To this:

In a heartbeat.

Summer Reading List

2010-06-06T06:56:00.000-07:00

As I am a person who reads all the time, the notion of a summer reading list is a little perplexing to me. How is this list supposed to be different from my regular reading list? Nonetheless, I have been drawn in by this recent article from NPR. They asked some independent booksellers for their picks and some of these will go on my library holds list.

I try not to find it stressful that I am usually reading at least two books at any given time and right now there are eight titles on my nightstand.

Did any of the titles in the article pique your interest? Do you make a Summer Reading List? Where do you get the recommendations?

This post is mostly inspired by the fact that it is a rainy, quiet Sunday morning and reading feels like the order of the day.

Happy Reading.

Heard in the car today

2010-06-02T23:49:00.000-07:00

From Big Red (monologue only):

“Is this God on this coin?”
"Is Michael Jackson deads?”
“You can still sing when you’re old and deads”
"Mama? Mama? I need to tell you something"
"when am I ever going to get to stay at school for lunch?
Today I was going to sit by Jack and I never get to sit by Jack and I'm never the helper"
"is there going to be a carnival at my school"
"can I goed to that carnivals at my school?"
"When are you going to take me to Fred Meyer to get a basketball shirt?"
"Are there any more snacks in the car? I know there are"

And with Tank (dialogue):

“we’re re-painting your bathroom”
“ooh, can we paint it red?”
“nope, we’re painting it custard”
“custard? What’s custard?”
“it’s the color in the living room”
“you mean white?”
“no, I mean custard”
“I don’t understand you”

May, in photographs

2010-06-02T09:36:00.000-07:00

One of the things I have enjoyed about Project365 is looking back at the end of the month and picking my favorites. Sometimes it's because I truly love the image and sometimes it's the moment or the memory the picture evokes that makes me love it. I like the pictures to sort of sum up the month's happenings. As it turns out, May was a very busy month, so it was hard to choose just four or five to tell the story. Curiously, I didn't happen to be partial to any food photographs. Without further ado, (and not in chronological order) my May picks:

Have I mentioned how much I LOVE macro photography??? I watched this snail emerge from its' shell in my garden. It was magnificent.

Celebrating the 40th birthday of a good friend with he and his wife. Good, good times.

Okay, so it's not a great photo, but my almost eight year old boy sometimes looks seventeen on the baseball field. I love watching him where he is comfortable, happy, and successful. I marvel at his skill and focus and sometimes wonder how he knows how to do all these things???

Now that I am caught up on sewing projects that I wasn't very invested in, I can work on the ones that I am passionate about...like this..."pink pinwheels". It's also the beginning of Handmade Jeny.

This is how they watch an episode of Tom and Jerry (which they think is hilarious)...this month we also discovered that Tank sits this close to the teevee because he is nearsighted!! Who knew??? Glasses are being made as we speak.

One of my favorite photographs I've ever taken. I'm thinking about getting a really nice big print of it for home framing.

They were, of course, so excited about the Mother's Day cards that they made me at school that they couldn't wait and gave them to me ahead of time. Tank's has adjectives around it that he feels describe me. I'm sure this is an interesting psychological study...the words are "polite" "smart" "special" and "sweet".

One Year

2010-06-01T09:57:00.000-07:00

Today I have been unemployed for one year.

This is the longest period of time in my adult life that I have gone without working. I am a person who marks time mentally; how long until? how long since? What was I doing at this time x years ago? So, of course I find myself thinking about the changes in the last year. In no particular order:

I have no job. weird.
I have lost twelve pounds (through no apparent effort)
I have taken up the following hobbies: knitting, photography, letterboxing, canning, cheesemaking, blogging
My hair has gotten really long. I have to sleep with it in a braid now. It's me, but if I get another j-o-b, I'll probably have to go back to a more "professional" look. I have also cultivated a better casual wardrobe. Before I basically had work clothes and pajamas.
I'm working on this
I am more relaxed and most people will probably tell you noticeably more pleasant to be around.
I have exercised more in the last year than I have in my whole life. I am often thwarted by injury though which has hampered my fitness progress and been very tough mentally. In the last year I have injured my back, my right shoulder, and my right elbow. Old age sucks.
I am less judgemental.
Being busy is not a religion - my least favorite thing is asking someone how they are and the response is "so busy". Everybody has the same twenty four hours a day and you choose how to use them.
I had a lot of angst about turning 40 before the actual event. In this case the anticipation was the hard part. Now that I am 40, there's a certain freedom in it that I can't quite describe. A few months ago I was very anxious about how much I'd accomplished and where I should be in my life at this age. I'm mostly over it now. It was a phase and I think the trick is to live like Ted Kennedy - always keep looking forward; don't look back.
The big one, the one I don't know how to articulate is around how much more time I spend with my kids. Frankly, during the school year, it isn't that much. A few hours a day with Tank; with Big Red it's obviously much more. In the summer, it's lots of long days just the three of us. I used to feel guilty about how long they were in daycare or afterschool care, but now I realize it wasn't that long. Institutional care of that sort doesn't damage kids, but I think my boys' lives are less stressful than they used to be. I know them better now than I used to. I think they are also more attached to me and know me better. My boys are their father's sons. They idolize him. I have always thought that maybe they prefer him a little more. But I think I have a more solid footing with them now than I did a year ago. Rather than a co-parent, I am more the primary parent now. Tank and I are understanding each other better each day and Big Red is still my baby (sometimes :)).
The one I am surprised by: I prefer to be home. The Vegas odds-makers would have lost a fortune on me.

So begins a day of reflection. Here I was at the half-way point. Here was the start of this blog. Are you a time-marker? How do you track your journey?

Black Bean Soup

2010-05-29T09:53:00.000-07:00

I don't know what prompted it, but a couple of weeks ago I got a Major craving...for Black Bean Soup.

This is a soup with a real depth of flavor from many vegetables and some bacon.

To start: soak a pound of rinsed, picked over, dried black beans with at least three inches of water above them overnight (or about 12 hours).

When you are ready to make soup, drain them. In a large, heavy dutch oven or stockpot, sauce 6-8 strips of minced bacon. When bacon is crisp, add the following:

1 Spanish (white) onion, chopped
3 ribs celery, chopped

1 leek, sliced, rinsed, and drained (got to get the sand out)
2 carrots, chopped

after about five minutes when the vegetables are softened (you don't want them mushy), add 3-4 cloves of minced garlic, 1 finely chopped jalapeno (seeds optional) and 2 tsp each of cumin and coriander. Stir just for a minute until the fragrance hits you.

Then add 2 cans of chicken stock (14 oz each) and water to total 12 cups of liquid. Also add one large minced tomato (or 1/4 c. tomato paste if you don't have a tomato).

Bring to a boil, reduce heat and simmer, partially covered, stirring occasionally for two hours. At this point, check the beans for doneness. You are going for creamy (not mushy or gritty). You might need to go 2 1/2 hours on the simmer. When they've reached doneness, stir in about 3/4 c of chopped cilantro and 1 tbsp vinegar (red wine, white wine, sherry are all acceptable vinegars here).

At this point, if you have a handheld immersion blender, now is the time to use it. If not, you can blend it in batches in a blender. As it is hot, do not put the regular blender lid on, rather hold a clean kitchen towel over the top so the heat can escape while you are blending. And can I just enter a plug here for the virtues of the immersion blender? You really need one. now.

But I digress. What consistency should you blend it to? That is entirely a personal preference. I like to blend it so it is pretty smooth. This is the time to check the seasoning, taste for salt and pepper and adjust as needed.

I like to serve this with a dollop of sour cream, a wedge of lime and a sprinkling of cilantro. I took this picture the next day and my husband had tossed my chopped cilantro, so it's kinda naked in the picture.

I also like it alongside my simple whole wheat cornbread and a salad (and a lager). Enjoy!

Long Holiday Weekend???

2010-05-28T12:49:00.000-07:00

"rain, rain, go away, come again another day."

Two weeks ago:

Today:

Need I say more?

The Happiness Project

2010-05-24T12:02:00.000-07:00

As you see in the "turning these pages" section of the blog on the lower right corner, I am reading The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin.

I don't remember where I heard about this book, but it came up in my library holds and while I am between Twilight books (yes, you can snicker) I'm going through this one.

The book is chaptered by month and so far I have read January and February which are about energy and marriage, respectively. A lot of this is common sense about things we can do to make us feel better, but some of it is new, and much of it is based on her extensive research.

The reason I'm calling attention to it in a post is that she has started a site for people to build their own happiness project, and I thought that might be a useful bit of information for y'all. If you click on the picture of the book below, it also takes you to her site.

So, just a little something from me to you on this grey (here) Monday morning.

To clarify, if you aren't from or haven't spent any time in Seattle, mornings are grey pretty much from September to June. Forks (of Twilight fame) is after all only a short drive away. (Yes, I am obsessed with Twilight).

Cheers!

Orphan Blocks

2010-05-21T15:54:00.000-07:00

If you aren't a quilter, you probably don't know what "orphan block" means. It means you did some experimenting when you made a quilt or you didn't count correctly and you end up with leftover blocks. If you are like me, you hoard your fabric and hang on to everything. During my recent fabric cleanout, I encountered a big bin full of orphan blocks. I set out enough blocks from the pile to make three new quilts. The rest were a rag-tag bunch that I didn't know what to do with.

Dr. E.L. convinced me to take them to the retreat and see if anybody had any ideas. And that is how the Quilt Whisperer was born. Dr. Carolyn managed to take the stack of homeless blocks and make three quilt tops out of them. I brought them home with me, layered, bound, and washed them and now they are going to Margaret's Children's Hospital Guild to be raffled off. Here they are. Thank you, Quilt Whisperer!

Disclaimer: excuse the crappy lighting. I should know better, but let's face it, I'm lazy.

These blocks were left over from an album patch quilt I made for my mom. It was the largest quilt I've ever made - queen size and had more than a thousand pieces in it. Initially I thought I might make nine patches, but shelved the idea (and the sample blocks).

Here is a corner of that quilt. Clearly, I was still in my "floral phase". The blocks seen here are 12 1/2" square...and there are 30 of them. There are 31 pieces in each block. There is sashing between the blocks and there are four borders on each side. You do the math.

Of course, my mom put it lovingly over my boys at her house last summer, whereupon in the middle of the night, Big Red had what is still the most gushing nosebleed of his life all over it. Her drycleaner spent several weeks painstakingly removing the stains by hand. Murphy's Law.

Back to the topic at hand...the second quilt is sort of an abstract holiday wall hanging. There is fabric in this one from at least eight other quilts I've made. The faded green star at the top left is the fabric from Tank's baby quilt. I ended up doing a less fussy block for him.

And lastly, abstract primary colors...

Lots of these blue and green fabrics are from a fish quilt that I made Tank when he was two.

So that's the end of the Quilt Whisperer's work. I, however, have made the three more quilts out of the last of the orphan blocks...they will debut in the first group of quilts for sale on Handmade Jeny...stay tuned.

New to Gardening

2010-05-20T07:32:00.000-07:00

I heard from a couple of you on Facebook and in email about the gardening sites you love and wanted to share with anyone else who's interested. I'm anxious to share pictures of our remodeled garden here, but I want it to fill in a little before I take the "after" pictures and we also have one more bed and fruit tree to plant.

First, in my research, I stumbled upon this book:

It's interesting, his theory is that you can plant more crops and get a better variety and yield by planting in square foot patches rather than rows. My raised beds are already planted for the year, but maybe next go-round, I'll convert one to his method. He also has a great chapter on compost and soil mix. He's a rebel rule-breaker and questions all the conventional wisdom, which I love. He has a website, Square Foot Gardening.

Secondly, another site that was recommended to me is this one, Diggin Food. I really like it, but I haven't checked out the whole thing and it came to me from multiple sources.

Thirdly, if you are in the Seattle area, I think Sky Nursery is a very helpful place for the newish gardener. I woke up to hear their ad on my husband's alarm clock so I am going to check them out.

Lastly, we have had success buying very inexpensive, good quality plants, shrubs, and trees on Craigslist.

I also wanted to share with you that as a new gardener, I failed to read the thinning instructions on my arugula seeds envelope...I should have thinned the plants about three weeks ago...ah, well. Everything got thinned yesterday that was out of the ground and ready. I did no thinning last year, so I'm already ahead of the game!

Happy growing!

What's Goin' On

2010-05-18T09:25:00.000-07:00

Watching :: gentle rain

Reading :: An Education

Making :: last charity quilt

Eating :: raisin bran

Feeling :: pensive

Thinking :: about the calendar

Hoping :: our garden thrives

Wondering :: what Disneyland will be like

Hearing :: faint sounds of the dryer

Liking :: macro photography

Wanting :: a letterpress

Playing :: not

Wishing :: I was a mellower person

Enjoying :: being wrapped up in the Twilight saga

Coveting :: a new wardrobe

In The News...

2010-05-17T09:01:00.000-07:00

This is not your everyday suddenly sahm post. There was great news this morning from the Supreme Court. They ruled that the Federal Government can hold sex offenders indefinitely if there is evidence that they pose a danger to society. Hooray! Read about it here...

I'll try to return us to our regularly scheduled programming in the next few days but right now I'm off for a post-birthday pedicure with my sister.

Cheers! Happy Monday!

Image of the Week

2010-05-15T09:57:00.000-07:00

Gardening?

2010-05-10T09:08:00.000-07:00

We are putting the finishing touches on our garden and I'll post some pics soon. My husband is a veteran, having grown up on a rural farm. I am pretty new to getting my hands dirty, but I am quickly falling in love with watching green things grow.

I am looking for good gardening sites on the web for creative ideas and answers to some of our questions. To that end, I'm asking for your help, Dear Readers.

Where do you go on the internets when you want to look at gardening sites? If it helps, our interests run to perennials (sp?) low maintenance native plants, edible gardens, and raised beds.

Thanks in advance!

Shot of the Day

2010-05-07T07:57:00.000-07:00

This was yesterday's shot of the day and I loved it so much, I had to put it front and center today...Happy Friday!

Hawaiian Bread Pudding

2010-05-06T09:33:00.000-07:00

The other day in the grocery store, while passing the "reduced items" rack, my eye fell upon a lonely round loaf of King's Hawaiian Bread. If you've never had this bread, well, then, you have not lived. This is a sweet, rich bread that I seem to remember gaining popularity in these parts in the early 80's and it has been a supermarket staple ever since.

I instantly thought bread pudding. My basic formula for bread pudding is this:

8 c. some sort of bread, preferably stale, cut or torn into chunks (precise, huh?)
3 c. some sort of dairy (half n half, milk, cream, etc. or some combination thereof. The only restriction I have is please not all nonfat)
4-6 eggs (as we are starting here already with a sweetened, enriched bread...that means eggs and sugar...I only used four eggs)
2 t cinnamon (or thereabouts)
3/4 c. chopped dried fruit (I used mango. Dried pineapple would be nice here, too, but sometimes the commercial variety is too sweet for me)
pinch of salt
up to 3T. sugar (brown sugar, white sugar, whatever pleases you)
1-2T. butter, cut in pieces

First, mix up the custard. Whisk together the dairy, eggs, cinnamon, sugar and salt. Then, toss in the bread. Don't be shy. You need a vigorous hand here. That bread needs to be drenched, soaked, completely saturated, drowned in the custard. You can stir it up a couple of times with a few minutes in between (hint: this is when you will be prepping the baking dish and chopping the fruit).

You need a 350 degree preheated oven. Grease a deep round baker in the 10" range. Mine was otherwise occupied, so I used a 3 qt baking dish. This is the exact size of a Pyrex 9 x 13 pan in case you don't have something fancier. If you use this size pan, the pudding will be firmer and shallower than a traditional bread pudding. You can butter the pan if you want. I use Pam, or what we call in the biz by its more romantic name, Food Release Spray. If using a 9 x 13 though you should watch it closely and pull it out as soon as it's done. Thou shalt not overbake.

Stir the mangoes into the soaked bread mixture and pour into the prepared pan. Dot with butter and sprinkle with sugar. If it helps you sleep at night, by all means sprinkle some cinnamon or nutmeg on top as well. If you have demerera sugar, so much the better.

The bread is already so rich and flavorful that we are basically just returning it from the reduced items shelf to its former glory. BTW, please don't make bread pudding with fresh bread. It's just bad form.

Bake it until, well, it's done. It will be nicely browned on top and springy to the touch in the middle. This will take at least 30 minutes but probably less than 45. I am Captain Accurate. If you intend to serve it from the oven, let it cool for about 10-15 minutes first.

You could add some mashed banana to the batter to keep it moist. You could make a rum sauce. You could add coconut milk or shaved or toasted coconut. I, however, am lazy, and did none of these things.

Mine might have been slightly overbaked this round. My family just walked by and cut off hunks of it like it was a snack cake and ate it that way. Also, reheated bread pudding is the stuff of the gods for breakfast.

That is all.

April Retrospective

2010-05-04T10:57:00.000-07:00

Here are some of my favorite shots from April. Spring has sprung. It was the best month so far this year for me personally and I had a hard time choosing my favorite photos to sum it up. Four months down, eight to go in project 365.

Cringe

2010-05-03T14:40:00.000-07:00

This came to me from a girlfriend; it was only a matter of time...

I too have read blogs that make me feel inadequate and filled with self-loathing. If at any point in my blogging I have somehow made it appear that I lead a sepia-toned craft-filled, baked goods always cooling on the sideboard kind of life, I offer a thousand apologies...

I now sit, at 2pm, unshowered, un-made up, in baseball cap and sweats with a vaguely dirty kitchen, a pile of laundry taunting me, and looking forward to feeding my family Costco enchiladas for dinner...I hope that I have occasional moments of grace but I hope with equal fervor that they have not ever made you feel inadequate, readers.

Happy Monday!

The Herbfarm

2010-04-29T09:05:00.000-07:00

What kind of freak puts her to-do list in her blog???...evidently my brand of freak.

The Herbfarm.

My wonderful husband arranged to take me there for dinner for the Big Birthday last Sunday just as I returned from my quilt retreat. We've been planning to go for a long time, but hadn't gotten around to it. It's a commitment of several hours. I'm glad we went on a Sunday when the festivities start at 4:30 rather than any other night when they start at 7:30. There's no way I would have made it. It's exhausting in a gluttonous gourmand kind of way and it lasted about five hours.

As we were doing our husband wife thing of dressing and primping to go, he said he thought I'd better wear different earrings and produced a beautiful pair of extremely sparkly diamond studs that I pretty much haven't taken off since. I am very spoiled indeed. (To be fair, it is my birthstone ;)

The theme of our dinner was The Chambers of The Sea. I'm going to let the pictures tell the story from here on in. I was so giddy I was teary when we arrived. It was the most extraordinary dining experience of my life...

We bought a copy of the print artwork to frame for our bedroom.

This was at my place when we were seated.

The menu...yes, that's nine courses...with paired wines...and we ordered a flight of three ports, 10 year, 20 year, and 40 year.

This is us at the beginning of the feast.

First course...tuna, scallop, oyster.

King crab salad and foie gras custard. There are no adjectives to do justice to the custard. It was the highlight of the meal. Exquisite.

I missed photographing a course here, but next up was salmon with a translucent slice of pork loin.

Halibut with short rib and farro.

I missed photographing a course here, but the next thing was this tiny baba with sherbet...the ebb tide.

Trio of desserts...I was getting uncomfortably full at this point, so BC had to eat most of my dessert.

This is the post-dessert candy that came with the coffee. Two of everything. You will notice that there are not two of everything on this platter as we had already begun eating it when I had the presence of mind to take this photo.

I should mention the little touches...when we gave our name to the hostess, she signaled someone to seat us who seemed to know who we were and consulted nothing as she led us directly to our table. Just after the first course was served, the owner and his wife discussed the restaurant's history, introduced the chef and the entire staff including their culinary pedigrees and gave a thorough summary of the menu. After dinner the chef came to each table to chat.

As we left we were each given a house made saltwater taffy elegantly wrapped. Two days later we received a lovely handwritten thank you note...needless to say I can't wait to go back. As we drove home we tried to calculate how often we could budget for such an extravagance and decided probably every couple of years...unforgettable.

If you have the opportunity to go...do.not.pass.it.up.

Time

2010-04-28T10:59:00.000-07:00

Time. Time. Time.

This morning got off to an uncharacteristically speedy start. Meaning I actually showered before BC left for work AND I had the whole kitchen cleaned up by the time I got the boys to school (on time I might add).

I used to be up showered dressed out the door and on my way to work by 6:30. How did I do that? I still have my slippers on and it's going on eleven.

My Big Birthday has me pondering time from many angles. How much time has passed and how much is left. How have I spent my time and how will I spend it. Do I make the most of each day? I am miserly with my time. I never feel like I have enough to do everything I need/want/should do. I am even more miserly with my husband's time. I haven't had enough. It's never enough. Will our lifetime be enough? I feel the push and pull of time in the boys' growing up. My baby is growing up. He needs me less and less. My big boy looks like an adult occasionally. He uses words like seldom and languish in everyday conversation.

Big Red goes to preschool three mornings a week for 2.5 hours. When you factor in travel time to and fro it's really two hours. Three times a week. Six hours. Six hours when no one is talking to me or expects anything from me. This is slightly longer than the amount of time I had in lunch hours each week when I worked.

Ponder that.

During this time I should be going to any appointments I need, cleaning my house, running errands, etc. etc. etc so that my time with the boys is spent in a quality fashion. It's not enough. Time.

I have a hard time juggling...time.

Right now for instance, I am spacing out, surfing the web and writing this post. Things I should be doing (in no particular order):

LAUNDRY!!
going to the gym
Dusting...everything in my dusty dusty house
vacuuming
sweeping/mopping
ordering photo prints for my quilt scrapbook
scrubbing a shower
machine quilting a charity quilt
planning dinner...for the next three nights
finishing a grocery list
writing the Herbfarm blog post and prepping the pictures
planting seeds in starter pots in my kitchen window
calling two friends
figuring out where I will take Tank for an eye exam
scheduling photography classes
running credit reports for all four of us (you really should do this once a year)
making moss killer with vinegar
learning more about letterpresses and figuring out when I can embark on that
planning my etsy store more seriously (handmade jeny)

I'm sure there are more but sometimes during my stolen preschool time I can't do anything. I need to just savor the silence of my house. I have to leave to pick him up in 15 minutes and I haven't done...enough.

Guess I'd better get going.

I'm out of...time.

Scenes from a retreat

2010-04-27T09:21:00.000-07:00

My gal pals and I had a fabu time in our little corner of paradise. We laughed, we cried, we cooked, we ate, we stitched, we bitched, we took walks and watched movies, we stayed up late and rose early.

The ladies even surprised me with a birthday celebration. I have been overwhelmed by the love and support of my family and friends in recent months and my birthday was no exception. More on that soon.

My only regret is not relaxing more. I know it sounds silly, but I really chained myself to my sewing machine like it was a sweatshop. What I get in return is the satisfaction of completing or furthering many projects. I even got to experiment with the movie mode on my camera (which shows I am not a filmmaker, but it turned out okay). You can see some shots of the retreat in my Flickr photo group (linked at the top of this page). Here are some of my favorites. I'll post shots of my crazy productivity soon.

Front of the lodge with our two far flung travelers.

One of the views from the deck

Layering is best done together

Jane Austen film fest

Quilts in the sun.

Gone Fishin'

2010-04-21T17:50:00.000-07:00

Okay, really it's gone stitchin'. Hope to be back here Monday. At which point I will be FORTY. Lawd help me...

Scenes from the past...

notice the cheeses, cured meats, and cocktail in the foreground here...

On my way to more of this...cheers! Miss you, Katy!!!!! kisses kisses kisses! jftb

self portrait

2010-04-20T14:48:00.000-07:00

I took this yesterday. I was watering the newly planted garden, looked up and saw something like this, so went and fetched my camera.

I really love this shot, the way the blinds cut across me, the light, my hair. It's something about seeing through and looking back.

I've had a rough 24 hours and this picture sums it up in some ways.

Bleh. It's gray again. Happy Tuesday.

OUCH

2010-04-19T13:54:00.000-07:00

If this interferes with my sewing plans for the weekend, I am going to be seriously pissed.

Jammed thumb on car door. WHY? because that is the kind of klutzy crap I do all the time. Like walking into door frames. No, I do not have a terminal illness that affects motor control or balance. I've been like this for a very long time.

nail separates from flesh. lots of blood. Spiderman band-aid. Throbbing pain.

grrrrrrr.

benedetto di uova

2010-04-16T07:43:00.000-07:00

We are trying to eat a little lighter in our home and this fits the bill. Even though it has meat and well, cheese, and um, okay, nevermind that part. Anyway, last night we had a "dining room date". Fed the kids the processed crap they love (nuggets and mac n cheese) and peas then let them watch a scooby doo while we had some wine and a pleasant dinner alone.

This is a completely free-form, rustic, elegant dinner. First off, saute a couple of vegetables. Here I used mushrooms (maybe 6?) and about 1/3 pound of asparagus, cut into pieces. You could do a little wilted spinach here or roasted red pepper, etc.

Cook up some polenta. Put cheese in it or not. leave it very soft, or put it in a pan in a warm oven so you can slice it.

Either fry up 4-6 slices of prosciutto or flake up some smoked salmon.

Then, poach a couple of eggs. In gently simmering water with a dash of white vinegar. For three minutes. Set the timer. I am not vigilant about many things, but please do not poach an egg for more than three minutes. Please.

You will want to keep everything warm in the oven until the eggs are done and you are ready to assemble.

On the plate goes some polenta, then a pile of the veggies, then the proscuitto or smoked salmon, then the egg, then maybe a dollop of pesto. Serve. Have some wine. Linger over dinner. Kiss.

Buona sera...

Quilting Resurgence

2010-04-15T00:01:00.000-07:00

I have been a quilter for about eight years and have probably made about 50-60 quilts. I keep a scrapbook of them with photos, dates, pieces of the fabric, etc. About a year ago I decided I had too many unfinished projects, so promised myself I wouldn't start anything new until I caught up. Here I am a year later still finishing the last one.

It's an Easter quilt with a center panel and blocks and borders around it. It's not really even my taste anymore. I've been working on it (or not) for about four years. I started hand quilting it, but when I finish the center panel I am going to switch to machine quilting to finish it. I just bought the fabric for the binding and I will finish it before April is out! We call it Frank and if you've seen Donnie Darko, you understand why.

About the same time as my UFO revelation, I decided I was tired of quilting and ready to branch out. I've learned some hand embroidery, sewed scarves, a handbag, drapes, etc. For 2010 one of my goals was to learn knitting, so I took a class and am working on a scarf. Now, I am re-energized to quilt again.

After cleaning out/organizing/spiffing up my sewing room, I have come to the conclusion that my stash of fabric is embarrassingly large. Like Hoarder large (at least to me). I don't even really like some of it. My new plan is to make scrap quilts until my stash is MUCH smaller and try not to buy any new fabric until it is depleted significantly. The other night when I started going through my fabric, I discovered a bin I had labeled "orphan blocks" and lo and behold, there were dozens of quilt blocks inside. I can quickly and easily stitch up several quilt tops from them.

I have separated some of my scrap stash by size and some by color and I now have plans for at least the first three quilts I will make using existing fabric from my stash. I am still deciding on some of the patterns and looking for modern scrap quilts to make. (If you have interesting links, please post in the comments!)

Just as I was ready to begin my big sewing binge, I had to take my machine in to the shop today as it was squeaking when I sewed. I won't have it back until next Wednesday - grrrrr. I guess I will just have to prep and stage all my projects for its return. Crossing my fingers that it isn't a big repair. I had it serviced less than a year ago, so it should be covered. Still...

Some things that have me excited about quilting again:

1. spiffing up my sewing room
2. new ten pack of rotary blades (sometimes it's the little things)
3. this quilt
4. Noelle's first quilt top with the gray background as the neutral...already purchased four yards of gray to get going...Noelle, I'm using your photo here.

5. Audrey's tumblers charm quilt. I halfheartedly attempted tumblers about a year ago, but didn't have the proportions right. Now I have a good template for them (Thank you, Audrey)
6. Anna Maria Horner's post on hand quilting with perle cotton. A revelation! I can't wait to try this.
7. Last, and most certainly not least, the upcoming annual quilting retreat with my friends. It's only a week away! This is a most precious group of women to me and I am over-the-moon excited for our trip. It's always inspiring and energizing and I learn so much from them. They each have different special gifts that they bring. I've been looking forward to it for months. It's been, shall we say, a complicated year for me and I really, really need this trip with my peeps. Three days of camaraderie, Jane Austen film adaptations, sangria, cooking together, reading, walks, and oh, yeah, some stitching!

Look for new quilts here hopefully soon! Are you energized to sew? Tell me all about it...